Today was the quietest Sunday I've had in a while. I went with Sam to the big class at church (basically 4-6 year olds). He had a good time. His teachers praised him for his coloring, which pleased him. He's been a little shying going back, but I think it's good for him. I talked to his teachers the day he restarted and they seem to be giving him extra TLC. It helps that several of the kids in his class go back and forth between the English group and the local language group. I get to just sit outside and chit-chat with parents, which is really wonderful. Today Emily went to the ministry leaders' group (since she does Sunday School for the baby group) and I took our kids home and just hung out. Really, really, really nice Sunday afternoon.
Life has also improved remarkably with the return of Linda and with a visit from YH, a dear friend who has been back for around ten days. Linda's helping us in the mornings and will help take the kids to school when Emily goes back to the States for a conference. She also helps the kids with breakfast and getting clothes on, can read to them time permitting, and has reduced our house work by about 90%. It's a small miracle--actually maybe even a large miracle.
My spring is looking better too. My school still is driving me a bit nuts but I have a reduced course load for the spring and since I don't have church leadership it will be much more balanced. Some other institutions are causing me grief--the coeditors of a journal I work on just resigned--but even here the interim editors will be a lot easier to work with. It's as if someone has lifted a weight off my shoulders. I also feel like I have more time for the kids now. I've been doing Legos with everyone and get to read to them every night. In the mornings I can focus on getting ready for the day but jump in as needed. Big improvements!
We just got the Christmas package from Em's parents in the mail. The kids loved their PJs and we're listening to the cassettes they sent. The peppermint bark is almost gone (delicious!). I've been reading through the book they sent, How Children Succeed, which is pretty interesting. It uses a lot of recent educational research on things like education and economic mobility, the relationship between grades and college completion, the traumas that disadvantaged kids face which usually stay with them throughout their life, the impact of stress on achievement, and on and on. The key theme of the book is character. Recent research has shown that things like "grit" make a big difference for kids in overcoming challenges and sticking with boring or challenging work. One of the mysteries is why specific kids are able to navigate challenges and how we can help them. In general, I think both Emily and I come from families with a lot of strengths and some excellent models for handling difficult situations. It really is difficult to know how to give children the mix of values we want for them: kindness and independence, resiliency and sticktuitiveness, a love of learning and an openness to self-criticism, etc. For us, at least for now, there's also a cultural overlay. What are our kids being encouraged in now? What specific challenges do they have? What type of help or time will be most helpful to them? Anyway, these are definitely things I think about as a parent. One of the things that's been a source of encouragement for us here is that the kids seem to be doing really well and are loved in several different communities. We also enjoy keeping up with family and that helps prevent us from feeling too isolated.
More in a while. I could really get used to relaxed Sunday afternoons!
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