Things We Still Don't Know

Emily's cousin is here, helping us out. It is a lot of fun. We're getting the apartment prepped for the new one. We're done with baby classes and have most of the necessities. This week we get our car seat checked out.

My brother shares a funny story from his almost-5 year old. We've been giving her updates, and she recently told him, "So we know when the baby will arrive, and we know it will be a boy. The one thing we still don't know is whether he will be black or white..."

To live with a child's sense of possibilities...

Baby Class #3

So we had our #3 baby class. It was pretty exciting. We viewed the maternity floor and did another walk through of the birth process. It was fun to be part of a procession of pregnant women. I told Emily it looked like "march of the penguins." A row of waddling women worked its path to the maternity floor. Emily actually looked more able than most of the other women (no holding of back, can walk up and down stairs). She's kept walking and moving and staying active and I think it is paying off.

We checked out lots of books from the library and most have been helpful. (The one exception showed an episiotomy scary--was that really necessary?, I ask you.) I am reading a midwife book also, which is pretty interesting. I had always assumed midwife meant something like "halfway mother" but I learned actually the "mid" is from German "mit" (with), so it's about being "with the mother." I am feeling a little guilty that we are not midwifing, or doula-ing, or house-birthing, or any of the other cool movements we read about. Instead, we have High Powered Doctors. So I am reading whatever I can to help however I can to know as much as I can to handle whatever comes. (Phew!).

I get the term "coach," which does not strike me as a particularly accurate term, since I can't yell at the team, I have never played this game before, and any instructions I have won't be especially appreciated. Any suggestions on what to call my role? One of the funny things about our class is how the teacher keeps trying to encourage the men that we have "real" work to do. Usually it is little things like making people wash their hands before visiting or fetching ice chips during the delivery. Oh well.

Emily's belly keeps stretching outwards, sort of like Pinocchio's nose. The primary signs of pregnancy are a dancing baby, irregular sleep, and the very rare craving (it was Indian food, which we had take out for lunch). So, that is the excitement here.

Baby Class #2

Tonight was our second planning class. Each time the structure is (1) chit-chat or introductions, (2) some overview of the birth process, and (3) a video with discussion.

I have a few comments. First, we are part of a really yuppy childbirth group. I knew this would be the case based on where we live. People make comments like, "well, we are in a starter home--only three bedrooms." Or, tonight, "it took three SUVs to bring home all of the presents from our baby shower." This doesn't really bother me, since it is often paired with "we are trying to figure out how much time we can take off afterwards." Or, from the teacher, "be sure that you have a backup in case your coach is out of town or at work." Hmm.... I'm pretty much always 10 minutes away. One of the many perks of the partially employed academic life. I will get to spend a LOT of time with the little one (easier given that we live in a one bedroom apartment) over many months. No overtime for me!

Actually, I like the classes and the group. We have a kind teacher, who's been doing this for 30 years. She's an encourager, which is what we need. We are probably over-informationed and under-encouraged, so I think this is a good person to learn from. And she has a cool Jersey accent, which is especially entertaining when she is reading us cheesy poetry.

We're not totally enthralled with our doctors, but every concern I have is rooted in our larger medical system. I may post more on this. I'm still thinking it through.

Right now Em's reading about the birth process on line. She just read someone who described the birth process as feeling like she had "swallowed a St. Bernard, and it was trying to escape out of her anus." Maybe I should go try to pry her off of the web before she finds me any more vivid similes.

Showered

Here are some images of the baby shower for Emily. Lots of fun! Many thanks to sister Lisa and cousin Reina.





It was for the women of the family. They had talked about making it a bigger party, but then it would have become a generic Christmas party. I think Emily was a little overwhelmed by the attention anyways. She's the oldest in the family, so this will be the first baby in eight or ten years (her youngest cousin is thirteen). It felt strange to be getting presents. We now have a carseat, stroller, sweaters, some diapers, onesies, socks, etc. She also bought a bag of baby clothes and some paternity pillows off of Craigs List.

My brother has daughters, so it has only been five or six years, but still quite exciting for my side. I sent out pictures of the thumbsucking image which were met with approval. I think it will be interesting that our little one will have a similar age gap to his cousins to what I have with my brother.

We have a name idea that is being shared, but I am not making it totally public yet. We had talked about it, and then Emily started calling him by this name, and somehow it just fit. More stories on this to come...

Seeing the Doc

Tonight we did Emily's monthly check-up. After this we come back in three weeks and then it is every two weeks after that. So things are speeding up.

Here are some of the notable recent pregnancy photos. Here we are at our church's live nativity:

Here is Theo checking out the new Diaper Champ:

Here is Emily looking more pregnant:

The baby is moving and shaking

So Emily's confirmed that it is kicking and punching, now sometimes several times a day. According to our searching, the baby should be closing on 2lbs and 15 inches. He is still kicking down and out (away from the ribs), but this will probably change at some point. Emily's not loving sleeping on her left side, but these are the current recommendations.

She keeps saying, "I just want to see him." And that is the challenge of where we are: waiting. We have some idea of what to expect. We have some sensation that he is growing and moving. And some small idea of how he looks. But mostly we have to just wait.

Is it the baby?

Emily's been feeling the possibilities of movement lately. I am hoping I get to see a little foot imprint at some point. She's been hoping to feel him move, and I hope she doesn't regret it lately (if he's a little kicker). Recent appointments have been fine. Hard to believe we only have 3.5 months left...