Sam at the Cemetary

OK, I was tempted to call this post "The Sametery."

About a ten minute walk from our apartment is an old, large cemetery. H-Town dates to the early- to mid-1700s and it is a fun place to walk. The names are always interesting (Gertrudes and Hatties and Asas and not a few Adolphs).

The oldest tombstones are impossible to read. I like the image of fading, that even names are worn away as the rock weathers.

I was also a bit surprised by the change in tombs over the last ten years. There were many hearts, etched guitars, cars, and cats, and even images of people. There was good and bad poetry, the King James mixed together with Chicken Soup for the Soul. Where the older markers just say "infant," new markers record the loss of a child on the day of his birth. This tomb is from such an infant, who was born a few days after Christmas last year. I told Sam that things worked out for him pretty well, all things considered.
It was very strange to walk with Sam through the cemetery. I was struck by how alive everything is. There were a fair number of critters: groundhogs, rabbits, squirrels, and deer. In a lot of ways, a cemetery is just a park. People jog and walk their dogs there. It's not entirely a strange place to bring a baby. Our baby mostly slept through the walk, or looked at trees and plants and the grass. Here he is heading towards a doze.
Emily took this picture of father and son. It was interesting to see things through her eyes. I realized I haven't been in a cemetery since I visited one in Williamstown with my mother and maternal grandfather and one near the Susquehanna in PA with my father and paternal grandparents. Before that it was probably the cemetery of a church where I worked my first year of seminary.
I liked this cross, especially set against the fields of tombstones and the hills in the background. Our new area is very beautiful.
I can't claim that I am particularly feeling my mortality, but I am very much aware of the changes happening around me. I found out that "the cat issue" has cropped up again, which will mean substantial conflict with our landlord. I've also just been cut for adjuncting at my alma mater in the fall, which irks me. We still aren't entirely moved in, it will be a while before I can have my classes set up, and I still can't see quite beyond this coming academic year. The outlook is hazy, as the magic eightball said. It helps that babies are entirely unaware of such frustrations. It is also soothing to take a little walk through these green hills filled with crosses and bones.

Head in the Clouds

Here are some recent Sam pictures. Above he's looking as pensive as a baby can look. I like the light in this picture.
Here he is being lifted up. This usually makes him very happy. Sometimes even if he is grumpy I can get him to laugh between the fusses.
He likes cheek kisses. It's hard to capture this is pictures because the pre-flash or the green light always throws him.
Here's a picture in his new exersaucer. Emily found it at a baby consignment store in town. He mostly loves it, but starts turning fussy after about ten minutes.
Here's Sam watching a Western Civ tape with me. They should re-market these dvds to students, since they are basically talking heads.

I think I have a longer post brewing, but I'm not quite sure how to put it. More to come...

The Sam Cam II

Toe Touching

The Cousins

Here are some of the pictures of our Annapolis visit where we saw Sam's cousins, Hope (little sister, left) and Holland (big sister, right). It was a pretty fun time.Sam's putting his fingers in his mouth lately, and is working on putting other things in his mouth, although this is still pretty new.
Here he is enjoying some tummy time with the cousins.
And Emily's got him in her wrap.
We visited the Doc for his 4 month on Friday. (Today is actually his 4 month b-day.) He was in the 94-55th percentile for head size, height and weight. The new skill he's working on is rolling over. He turns on his side in bed and can sometimes make it to his tummy, although he doesn't yet bring his arms up. Exciting stuff!

The Camera is Packed

Sometime here I will add recent pictures, and I still need to excavate the camera from the rubble that is our apartment. There's some urgency on this, since Samuel is being incredibly cute lately. He's already working on his rolling over. He's using it as a way to move his little baby body closer to us. He likes being held overhead, and having his feet or cheeks kissed. He has developed some new sounds--the start of a laugh and a little bark he gives occasionally. Our brains our totally baby tracked lately.

Personally, I am finding myself stretched by this new combination of life developments: the Baby, the Move, the Job... I am loving them all, but collectively they are crushing me. I think partly I can feel the doors shutting. For a P it is very hard to surrender the hope that I can be all things. While, there are always new options, at least for this year I am a historian in NW NJ, with a shared office and an apartment. For the coming year, formal ministry, travel, and conferencing will be a smaller part of my life. I'm still thinking about how I feel about this.

Moving

We are mostly moved, for now. It's been a pretty hectic few weeks, and we are doing our best to put the pieces together. Some of the highs:

• a short trip to Annapolis where we met my brother and his kids, my parents, and my aunt and uncle. It was great to get away.
• huge amounts of help in moving from Emily's family. They basically moved us in three days and cleaned our entire apartment.
• the school environment seems very good. I like my coworkers, my classes will be okay, and we are getting to know the town.

On the other hand, there were these lows:

• our cat is apparently supposed to be declawed, which we won't do, in order to live in our apartment. We feel that we were misled about this, and so far I have evaded signing any agreements. We are now at a lull, but this will be a stress for the near future. Our apartment also didn't have keys ready for us on our move in day and has apparently lost one of our checks. This is very, very frustrating. I hope we last here.
• I'm about at my wits end from the fact that moving never ends. We can't find our utensils. I don't know whether or not to throw out all of the boxes. I think I'll keep what we have left in case this goes badly. I have this nightmare vision where we are loading armloads of stuff into a U-Haul if we have to move again. I have about 0% trust in where we live, which is not a good sign for family harmony.
• We are really, really tired of commuting back to Old Town. We've done this just about everyday and it looks like it may happen again tomorrow and probably some next week. It's a 3 hour round trip in slow, NJ traffic--ugh!

Sam is doing well. Emily told me just today that he "mostly" turned himself over on his own. He is pretty much a happy, smiley baby boy. He opens his mouth wide with glee if you kiss him on the cheek. He loves mornings. He is working on grasping objects and is now moving them towards his mouth. He's still not bottle feeding great, but seems very well nourished.

That's our news. We should have pictures in the next few days.