Small Baby Big World

Trip to the Gardens 2

2012-01-26T04:58:00.001-08:00

It was really an interesting place to visit--one we'll always remember. The gardens were beautiful, if a bit cold. We'll try to go back again another time when the kids are a little older. Sam had fun trying out rides, watching a band, playing with the DIY grasshopper. Emily, Eva, and I took a walk through the back half of the gardens. Good memories!

Trip to the Gardens

2012-01-26T04:50:00.001-08:00

Year of the Dragon

2012-01-25T04:19:00.000-08:00

We're officially half-way through our break. I think today pulled us into the overall-positive range, after a rocky day yesterday. I feel like we've planned this year better and are having a good time and will carry some real memories from it. However, it is also just hard to stay positive going morning to night with all three. Coordinating naps and travel and feeding and sleep are not easy. I don't know how people do this plus one or two full-times jobs all at the same time!

Sunday we did the New Year's meal with some foreigners, a retired pastor who lives on campus, and a few other guests. Eli loved the stairs and spent a lot of time practicing moving up and down them (he did this today at a playground we visited). Sam hadn't slept and seemed under the weather. He was "ok," but not very friendly. At this age, if they want to be done and go home, it's hard to keep them from telling everyone. The meal itself was great. Eva is doing more across-the-room walking. She's really getting her legs. They both seem to be saying a little more.

Monday we stayed close to home. We saw coworker John in the morning and two Americans in the afternoon (husband is retired and was guest teaching this last semester). They were pretty interesting--I really wish we'd met them earlier.

Tuesday a rough day. We got out the door late and the place we went was packed. Everyone wanted to stop and say hello to the twins. I don't know what would have made it better, but we were all in a funk by the time we got home.

Today was really a good day. We saw our adoptive aunt here. We went to visit her at a set of gardens and a tea house. The drive was smooth (after we had the address inserted into gps). The tea house was remarkably child-friendly. We could sort of barricade the twins away from the food (important because of hot tea, etc.). There was an awesome indoor playground (helpful for a cold, rainy day), and the gardens were absolutely beautiful.

Sam got a DIY grasshopper, which made him very happy, and he napped all the way home. We had a good evening together. We did ten minutes of piano. I think he doesn't yet really hear tone differences. The "doh-doh-soh-soh" of twinkle-twinkle is hard for him to hear, so he's tempted to just bang on keys and sing. But he enjoys playing with it and I think in time he'll develop and ear. It's at least a fun hobby for dad.

Tomorrow the plan is to have international students over. Friday we are going to drive to a school about fifty miles away (a big drive for us). Sunday is church. That's our week.

Otherwise, things are coming along. I've had a little bit of the "things are harder cross-culturally than I would like them to be" feeling. It's helpful for me to remember that neither P-Town nor H-Town were super easy either. I'm probably idealizing our trip home a bit. I think I tend to overthink things, which is not always helpful. At the same time, overthinking has helped me stay sane in some kind of crazy situations and we have done a really good job with several big adjustments (geographic, occupational, kids).

That's our news! Just four more days of all-family fun...

Black Stallion

2012-01-17T04:57:00.000-08:00

Sam is really into the Black Stallion lately, which is one of Emily's favorites (key scenes are the horse on the boat, the horse killing a snake, and the final race). Below is Sam's drawing from tonight of "Boy with Helmet on Black Stallion" (SPS 1/17/2012) And when Emily told Samuel that horses eat carrots, he asked for a carrot to eat tonight.

Sam's teacher wrote in his book recently that he's coming along his drawing, and Sam really does draw at home a lot now. It's funny how the motor skills seem to click into place at certain points.

Eli can now almost say "all done" or something like it, and Eva says "night night" (pronounced "nai nai"). Eva can climb up on the couch on her own, although she's not as graceful getting down. Eli can climb up on the table from a chair! Obviously, this is something we discourage. Since our own changes often seem so small, it's fun to watch the kids making such obvious advances and so many new discoveries.

Sam, a Sunday Evening

2012-01-15T07:11:00.001-08:00

Today was a tiring day--basically everyone but Sam has a cold. Still, there were some really funny moments. Tonight Sam and I were watching "Megamind"--a father/son favorite, and there's a scene with a skeleton. I started explaining to him what a skeleton is. It was one of those conversations where you realize that what you are saying sounds crazy, but luckily toddlers are pretty believable. So we spent some time googling images of skeletons, muscles, organs, etc. We felt elbows, jaw bones, clavicles, and other bones. I showed him how muscles get harder and softer. He listened to my heart for a few seconds. I forget sometimes how much of the toddler mind is white spaces or fantastical images, which are slowly (but never completely) replaced with new expanses of knowledge.

We read "Where the Wild Things Are" tonight, which is a favorite. Eva, Sam, and I went to the student center on campus and played on the piano for a few minutes. Sam's learning to identify the sets of black keys (just to note where there are two and where there are three) and he can say the "do, ray, mi..." set of words. He's still pretty much tone-deaf. Curiously, we were signing in the car today and Eva started making noises. I didn't even notice it, but Emily said she wanted us to sing more.

Sundays are a day of "running out the clock." We came home from church early, which was a mistake. Sam also fell asleep in the car. He took a longish nap, but instead of sleeping 4-6 (as he often does on the weekend) it was more like 1:30-3. It's funny how small differences still throw us off. I spent some time talking to the neighbors, which was fun. She said we're probably still several years from being able to have one parent take out all three kids without going nuts. However, she did say that 1-2 is a rough age, and that we can be hopeful about improvements in our future.

I think we're feeling generally better about life. There are lots of small logistics for this week: car registration, trip to Costco, grading, etc. I'm hoping things will be smooth on those fronts. It is amazing how the week can just evaporate.

Nothing else new here. The presidential elections were Saturday, with undesired results :( Week after next is off. We're trying to plan some fun things for the week and hope we can focus on the fun side of things.

That's what we are up to!

Piano Man

2012-01-13T08:06:00.000-08:00

Today Sam had his second audition--okay audition is too strong a word--for his Suzuki class.

[To recap, a few weeks ago I got it in my head that Sam could do with some sort of activity, now that he is almost four years old. Northern City is not big on your traditional American activities--nary a t-ball league or junior soccer group around. However, what Northern City does have is a boatload of little educational schools. Want to take English or Japanese? You're in! Ditto for "mental math," nearly any musical instrument, dance, etc.]

Anyway, he's tried two teachers, which is their system. The first one, Teacher Tall, was very friendly. She put a sticker on each of his fingers and had him work on playing Twinkle, Twinkle, finger by finger. She was fairly friendly, and had some puppets she used also. The second teacher, Teacher Ball, did a little more. She showed Sam middle C, had him look at the black keys ("chopsticks" for double keys and "forks" for triple keys). Sam is supposed to pick one of the teachers, but I will probably just let them know we're flexible. He may start with just fifteen minute classes at first.

A funny thing was how Sam reacted. To put this in context, Sam talked pretty much continuously from the time I picked him up at preschool this afternoon until the lesson, and the from the lesson until we got home. But at the lesson, he acted almost autistic. I don't mean this to mock. He has a funny thing he does sometimes where he won't make eye contact and will only answer questions in a really quiet voice. I think he was just distracted by the environment (two baby grands in a room; a funny chair; etc.). Anyway, it was a funny meeting.

I also have been getting some piano advice. When I went the first time, one of the parents told me that it's important for parents to be energetic and not hands off. She said the great thing about Suzuki is that you can make "twice as much progress." When I talked to the first teacher, she asked me why we were doing this system now and I said something about like that Suzuki was more relaxed. She said that it's not relaxed and that study is very important. Today I found out that my language teacher's kid did two years of music classes followed by eight years of piano lessons. She said the important thing is that "you can't take any breaks." It's a lot more pushy than the "find your passion"/"follow the kid's interest" I grew up with.

Lest any of my few readers are excited at the prospect of a musical kid, I should really try to dampen your expectations now. Sam has trouble remember "Twinkle, Twinkle," and doesn't have such great pitch. But the hope is that maybe if he gets some exposure now he could the kids' choirs at our church in a couple of years, and I think this is our chance to get a feel for what's out there. There's a Yamaha school right near by also (they do the classes with keyboards). If I'd known they were around, I might have gone with them. On the other hand, I think Sam really thrives with some one on one, and he might do better with one regular teacher and some time just for him. The hope is that I can shift some of our evening time towards a little bit of practice. In the background I probably need to remember my non-success as a soccer/tball/baseball/kiddy French class/guitar/piano player, and just treat this as a fun experience. It's funny: I didn't take piano lessons for long, but I do remember some of the very simple songs I learned, and the class introduced me to the staff, treble, bass, etc. We'll see how this all turns out...

Saturday

2012-01-07T08:08:00.001-08:00

Today was actually very good for a Saturday. We skyped with my parents and had a slow morning. Around noon we headed down the mountain, parked, then walked to a pizza place we know. After that was a park and then some more walking. Emily had a cup of coffee and I drank some tea while the babies napped. Sam got to to go to two different playgrounds. All in all, a very nice day. The group bath went well (although I think our tub has a small crack) and the babies went to bed comparatively peacefully. There were some small frustrations (Sam wouldn't go to bed without one of us in the bed, and it took him forever to fall asleep), but all things being equal, it was a nice day. Last Saturday was sort of the opposite extreme (sick kid, rainy day, exhausted Emily) whereas today we all seemed on top of things.

I think I've had just a touch of homesickness lately. It coincided with the end of the semester, Christmas, etc. Some of it is also that January is one of the months where people start asking me to do things for the coming semester, and I always feel like getting out of these things takes more energy and work than I'd like. I try to keep repeating that my goals now are language study and teaching. I can do worship services, some student advising, the occasional sermon, help with a thesis, etc., but there's a limit to what I can do well.

The babies are very entertaining right now. They were both very smiley today. I had fun pulling Eva around the apartment (her pajama feet make it like skates for her). She can blow kisses and say bye-bye. Her talking sounds like, "hsieh, hsieh" or "nyiah, nyiah." Eli's is more of a barking "Gba!" They both have molars through. I think Eli must be up to 10 or 12 teeth and Eva's at 8. They're really coming along.

Sam loves drawing. His beloved Crayola 64 pack has really come in handy. We're trying to figure out whether to try him on piano lessons. There's a Suzuki school near his preschool. My thought is that trying him now could be a low pressure way to encourage music and he could play at it for the next year. I don't remember loving piano lessons, but I also don't remember really disliking them, and they at least helped me to think about music. I think I was nearly tone deaf as a child, and I can't tell with kids what the balance is between nature and environment. I've always been more visual than aural, but maybe this is just because I come from a family that was more focused on the visual/reading (although big brother was musically gifted). It's another place where there's a cultural difference. Here kids start on music early, but by junior high most of them stop their studies because the academics take over and the tests are the most important thing. With us, we seem to focus more on sports and clubs early and then music begins around fifth or sixth grade and really only gets serious in high school. Anyway, these are my cultural thoughts today.

We're trying out more different tv shows too. We have sesame street, leap frog, and wiggles. I'm not sure what they'll like the most. We have a really dumb phonics video, but Sam likes it.

I think Emily is coming along. The spreadsheet she needs to put together for her dissertation will be fairly massive, so she's trying to figure out how to move to the next stage. I don't know if she needs info on all 400 sites, or if she can do a faster initial read and more focused depth later. I feel like for the semester we're at an in between point. We have New Year coming up, which will throw us off our stride. In the meantime, we have two weeks to get caught up, for me to do grading, for kids to do their thing, etc.

Baptism Pictures

2012-01-07T07:35:00.000-08:00

Christmas

2011-12-25T20:48:00.001-08:00

Below is a post I'd meant to enter earlier, but had just saved as a draft, and I've now added some pictures...

We did Christmas in stages this year--my parents said it sounded to them like the 7 days of Christmas. In early December, when Emily's parents were here, Sam got a new cement truck. It's a Tonka and is super sturdy. I see all three kids enjoying it in the years ahead. Sam also got some books then, like "Goodnight, goodnight, construction site." He had a really fun time with it.

Last Friday I wrapped up some of the presents and put them under the tree. When Sam came home he was outraged that he couldn't open them all (this was his first time with presents under the tree where he knew what a present is). I let him open two presents, including "Wall-E" (a dvd) and then quick hid the rest. Saturday night he opened two small presents while I skyped with my present, and on Christmas he opened a block set we'd gotten him with a little crane and a dump truck. I like the Duplo Legos because they're essentially unbreakable and unswollowable. Sam's enjoying them and now has some little people and animals that go with the set.

Yesterday really was pretty exhuasting. At the neighbors, Eli broke a fruitbowl and Sam whacked the 8-year old by accident. I still sometimes feel like we're not really presentable for the public as a family. On the other hand, I know they have to be socialized, and part of this family, but some of it also has to come from church, school, neighbors, etc. It is a little exhausting.

That is our life. We have a ham and potatoes so I think we're basically set for a New Year's eve dinner sometime. However, perhaps next week will be a little more quiet.

Baptisms

2011-12-25T06:22:00.000-08:00

This only gives a hint of the day, but it was a very nice baptism service (long--two hours-ish). Our friend YH really saved us by coming along. We also went to the English service and saw a lot of people, and then went to friends' tonight. It was pretty exhausting, but I told Emily I think this is a Christmas we'll remember.

Busy days

2011-12-22T20:17:00.001-08:00

These days before Christmas are often a little busier. This week I haven't had classes at school, but there's still a lot to be done. I met with a thesis student, worked on a syllabus, did a shopping trip and took Eva for her innoculations. Emily and I had a morning out after Sam's performance for school (the monthly birthday celebration). Life is good but busy.

We find that twins is still an adjustment. Now that Em's parents are gone we have whole weekends to deal with again. Yesterday we spent some time talking about how to make them better. Getting three together and out the door isn't easy, and we have slightly different ideas of the best way to do things (I'd tend to rather have all threee for a couple of hours and then a total break, whereas Em finds all three too much). I don't think there's a perfect way to do this, and we have developed some good coping meganisms (staggered sleep! a list of places to go, long Sundays at church, and so on). I keep trying to remember that this is situational, and that it will improve with time. Today while I was skyping with my parents it was fun to watch the three kids interact with each other. While this includes a certain amount of competition (Sam takes Eva's toy, Eva takes Eli's binky, Eli cries), it holds forth the slightest glimmer of a day when we can tell our kids to go away and play with each other.

Sunday is the baptism. I think it will be nice. It will be a long Sunday, since we should leave around 9 and also have lunch and English service and dinner with friends. Emily and I were realizing this is our first real "whole nuclear family" Christmas. Last year only sort of counts, because the twins were so tiny then and we still had family around. This year we are trying to figure out what the traditions are and how to do things. I realized pretty much every Christmas my family loves to go see movies. Emily's tends to go to the zoo or public events. Hopefully we'll get a nice mix of the traditions. On Wednesday I took Sam to Arthur Christmas, which was really fun. The 3D glasses don't quite fit him, but he loves being in the theater and we went to dinner beforehand, and we got to ride the buses home. Next year will be fun with the lighting of the trees in P-town, time with different family members, and Christmas around others. This year is still kind of a trial run.

I find the to-do list always stretches a bit longer than I'd planned. We haven't done Christmas cards yet, but did buy some yesterday. Presents aren't wrapped. I submitted a job expense and then at some point I need to do the medical receipts for the last year. I have another manuscript project (smaller) to wrap up by the end of the year. Grading will be really, really ugly this year, since the number of students is higher. That's the list!

In the middle of it all, we're trying to keep some of the mystery and joy of the season. Sam brought home glutonous balls from school yesterday for the solstice and we love having our Christmas tree up. We're cooking some familiar foods and enjoying the special-ness of this time. It helps that we get the national new year's break in another month, although we're a little terrified of watching all three kids for such a stretch. Exciting days!

Emily did fine

2011-12-16T12:23:00.000-08:00

Just a quick note that Emily made it through her preproposal with no problems. The much-feared grilling did not occur, and she said the presentation and about a half-dozen questions/suggestions were fairly smooth. Just as she started skype the babies both began crying, so I stayed in with them. I think they heard the call and woke up, and the dehumidifier had filled up, so there was no background noise. I emptied the machine and then I strolled Eli and held Eva. Afterwards Eva clapped for Emily.

This step isn't necessarily a huge one, but it's one of those "speak now or..." moments. It gives Emily a chance to introduce her work to others in the program and to get feedback. That there were no big snags is a great sign. I think her committee likes what she is doing and approves. Hopefully she's within a month of the proposal defense and would have six months to take her 130 pages to 200-300 pages. I think she may be past the tipping point, which would be great. I know a family friend had told my mom "sometimes it's easier to finish than to not finish," and hopefully Emily is within range of her goal now.

Em's parents should be back home now. They really gave us a Herculean effort and helped us do a lot we wouldn't have been able to do otherwise. We each made steps on big projects. The babies are more mobile. Sam got a lot of two-on-one time and seems very happy with life. I think it will be a fun weekend for him. We did some socializing, which is important for being part of different communities here. I got through a couple of sermons and the hardest part of the semester. We managed to pass on some of our baby things and seem to be turning a corner. Emily really has a handle on what she needs to do now.

It's 4:30 am here. I slept enough earlier to wake me up, but I think I can probably go back to sleep now. I hope to update with more pictures and other posts in the coming days.

Christmas Tree

2011-12-06T21:22:00.001-08:00

This is the first "big" Christmas tree we've had as a family, now in its third year. Sam likes it a lot and enjoyed decorating it. We have to barricade the babies, who are moving increasingly fast. Fun times.

Ginger Bread House

2011-12-06T21:18:00.000-08:00

Here's Sam making the gingerbread house. Emily said it was fun, and we've been slowly eating the house, since we don't think it will last long with the humidity.

Manuscript is in

2011-12-06T00:51:00.000-08:00

It's been kind of a crazy week. Yesterday I mailed in the 500 page manuscript for the project I've been working on with my advisor. It felt good to be at this point, and the hope is that it will take some of the pressure off that I've had from the deadline.

Classes are coming along. I struggle sometimes with trying to teach in fields where I know a set of students is checked out, or where I have radically different teaching options. In general I am fairly happy, but I know this is a kind of perennial concern.

Everyone else is coming along. Em's preproposal is set for next Friday, so that is stressing her out a bit. It's another thing she has to prep. The good news is she has an outside reader and she's talking to her advisor tomorrow.

The babies and Sam all seem good. Sam did a gingerbread house over the weekend at a bakery with Em and her mom. Eli's been fussy today, perhaps from his shots. It's been rainy, but we had clear skies this afternoon. I saw someone from church, and a student from five years ago, which was nice. All in all, it's been a fairly good situation.

I have my new computer set up in my office. It makes a difference. I'm at a pivot point now in teaching and with different projects, so I'm grateful to have good technology and to be able to use it. This is also how I stay in touch with people back home, so it also makes that easier.

A Funny Encounter

2011-11-29T02:46:00.000-08:00

Someone at church gave Sam a rubber rooster, which he has come to love.
Twins in their fall glory

The sun has set on the first year of twins-parenting...

About a week ago, we donated a number of the twins’ toys, seats, clothes and other things (Emily’s amazing double-breastfeeding pillow) to a couple expecting twin boys. We heard about them through a coworker’s wife. It was a very funny feeling, because I am already forgetting how big a transition it is from normal life, to intense pregnancy, to double newborns. A year later, it was a surprise to see how far we had come. Sleep is still a challenge, and the kids want as much time as ever, but they also smile and crawl or walk, can go longer without eating or sleeping, and seem a lot more solid and healthy. The responsibility is the same, but the anxiety is a lot lower. The couple seems happy and nervous. I hope everything goes well for them. I gave them some (possibly unwanted) advice on baby-feeding and considerations on whether they want more kids.

When they left, our house suddenly looked a lot less like a preschool. The jumper, a seat, a swing left with them, and we suddenly had more space than we’d had in a while. This was well timed with the approach of Thanksgiving. It's hard to believe how far we've come.

Thanksgiving

2011-11-25T04:09:00.001-08:00

We had our third/fourth Thanksgiving on the island. I had my first in 2005 over dumplings with an elder dentist here. It's hard to believe how the time has passed.

Last night was a lot of fun. Emily ordered a turkey and some of the side dishes from a restaurant, but then made or bought some great other dishes. Linda did a stirfry, Barb and Randy tracked down sweet potatoes, Emily did homemade stuffing. It was a very pleasant meal. We invited about six other adults, and then with the neighbors and kids we were technically 15 of us, which is a personal record.

I had a long day yesterday. In the morning I taught from 8 to 11, then in the afternoon I had language class and the evening was Thanksgiving. I also attended a lecture and then did some work last night. I'm doing a major push for a book I'm working on with my advisor. I am really looking forward to it being finished. It's been a long time in the works.

That is our news here. Today a package came from my Uncle Paul and Aunt Joan with a lot of clothes, and we inherited some older boy clothes from another American I know. We're feelnig grateful and blessed. It's been a nice few days. Next week will be busy, since we also have people coming from denom. I think it will be a good trip, but time will tell. I feel like we're juggling everything, but it keeps on going.

Sam went to the zoo with the grandparents today. He had a great time, but I can tell that he is quite tired now and it could be ugly getting him to bed.

Day at the Park

2011-11-20T17:21:00.000-08:00

Yesterday our church was at the park. It was a fun day, and we walked around for several hours afterwards. This is our first time at the park, but it really had some wonderful features. There was a small playground, a garden shaped like a whale, and even a maze made out of bushes. Lots of fun!

Eli Walks in the Park

2011-11-20T04:22:00.000-08:00

Eli Walks Around the Apartment

2011-11-20T04:17:00.000-08:00

Retreat 5

2011-11-17T09:54:00.000-08:00

For some reason at first I got an error image uploading these, but the upside is I think I've now figured out how to post more than five pictures. This is a lighthouse near the beach town where we were. I wasn't there for this part of the trip, but it was fun to see the pictures of everyone else. I know one of the families we met on the retreat said they had family photos from this place over many, many years. Aside from the long-ish trip, it really is a fun place and the weather was great.

Retreat 4

2011-11-17T09:49:00.001-08:00

Three babies! With my classmate-coworker friend and their baby.
Sam runs on the dance floor.
Sunset
Mom with Eva
The brown-haired ones (self-portrait)

Retreat 3: The Pool

2011-11-17T02:47:00.001-08:00

Here he is at the (huge) pool. Fun times...
Kid's pool
Dressed up and ready to swim
Apparently Sam was pretending he was a robot. To the side is a balloon animal a staff member gave him.

Retreat 2: The Playroom

2011-11-17T02:41:00.000-08:00

Slide!
Crash!
Emily had said Eli was trying to climb up the slide, and I didn't quite believe her...
Eva's scooting
Sam is a rocket on a car like this

Retreat 1

2011-11-16T17:40:00.000-08:00

It's been a busy couple of weeks here. We went on a church related retreat over the weekend, only our second overnight with the babies (which, you may recall, kind of killed off Emily). This one went better.

The trip there was long-ish but uneventful. It took about eight hours of travel between cab, train, and bus. We did a lot of stops, which has pluses and minuses. Our neighbors said they actually like more stops on longterm air travel, and I can see some advantage. I wish on the way home we could do medium-long legs rather than one medium and one long.

Sam was able to sleep in Emily's parents' room, which meant he didn't wake up the babies or get woken up by the babies. Sam had a blast on the trip. He enjoyed seeing everyone, there was a great playroom he could play in, and he got to go to the beach and to go swimming in the pool (he played "robot" with his goggles on). Sam wasn't great at the first meal, but he soon had an older Korean mom take him under her wing. He ate almost exclusively shrimp and fish for dinner. I think he must have been starving. It's nice that he can speak local language now, and makes it easier for him to play with others. There was one other boy, but communication was a little hard. We had dinner in the disco room of the (awesome) hotel, and Sam loved running around, dancing, and being swung. He's at a high-energy, exciting age.

The babies got backpacked a lot, which they like. They slept in mini-cribs or in their double stroller. They loved the time around others. Eva's more reliably standing up and Eli's a champion crawling. He's beginning to walk. Emily says he looks like "a drunk penguin" walking, which is a quite accurate description, I would say.

The retreat was very good for me also. On the last retreat I didn't get to participate much, but this time Emily and I were able to lead the opening worship and one or both of us were often able to participate in things. I think we probably have a long time where it will be hard for us to participate in things as a family, but now if we have to one of us can take Sam to a talk or service and he can last through at least part of it.

My plan for the coming weeks is really to bunker down and to write as much as humanly possible. I'll have to see how it goes. We're planning on submitting a book manuscript in the first week of December.

In terms of daily life, there are some small trials. Emily's screen on her laptop broke, without a major fall. So that is frustrating. We have a fair amount of computer redundancy, but it makes sense that she wants a good machine as she dissertates.

That's the news! Pictures to follow...

Birthday 2

2011-11-08T06:05:00.000-08:00

Eli's high stepping it...
Party!
Sam with a beloved big sister
Two cakes! (See guys, you never had to share...)
Sam holding a lizard that the boys next door caught. They also caught butterflies, grasshoppers, and other fun critters. Sam really liked the lizard.

Birthday 1

2011-11-08T05:53:00.000-08:00

So, we did the double birthday! It was a bit exciting, and we brought together a fun mix. There was the history teacher and his family, a music teacher, Emily's parents, the next door neighbors, a friend of Emily's and her family, and Linda. Sam had a great time playing with the boys and girls. It was fun to watch him move between games and languages. He practiced "toasting" with the girls (ganbei!) and caught bugs with the boys. He got an awesome cement truck. We had just the right amount of pizza and two cakes. It was a fun afternoon. We reminisced about the excitement, anxiety, and joy of the last year. It's hard to believe they're getting so big. As I write this Eli is up to eight or ten steps in a row, and Eva is faster on her bottom and doing great pulling up. Sam's reading with Grandma and has been really enjoying the extra attention. Emily's getting some sleep and I'm feeling a little more put together. Here's looking forward to another exciting year...

Halloween

2011-11-04T07:01:00.000-07:00

We were away on our fun/exhausting (depending on whether you were everyone else in the family, or Emily) retreat over the last weekend. We missed local Halloween festivities, but Sam dressed up for school on Monday. He really enjoyed the party. I saw a paper pumpkin he made. They had the kids dance down a runway. Fun times! Who knows what next year will bring?

Fall 2011 Miscellaneous Pictures

2011-10-29T19:11:00.000-07:00

Here are the kids all together. Sam's got on his beetle costume for Halloween.
A picture to warm a librarian's heart.
Eva is happily scooting around.
Sam's loving playdough lately.
Eli kind of reminds me of Tony Soprano here. He's wearing the tux Sam wore around 16 months. Eli is a strong little baby.

These are jut some recent pictures I didn't have time to post until now. Hopefully they give a picture of our life in recent months.

Bath time

2011-10-29T19:05:00.000-07:00

This is the traditional style bathtub a friend of Emily's passed down to her. It fits all of the kids, which is great and they love playing in it. It will make weekend bath time a lot more relaxing. Yesterday was the trial run and everyone had a great time.

Family Adventure

2011-10-29T18:54:00.000-07:00

Friday afternoon through Saturday morning we went to a one day couples' retreat at our church. It was a trial run in several ways. We drove over the mountain and to the coast, which we'd never done. There were some highs and lows.

Highs:

-We did it! All 5 of us away for 24 hours.

-Sam had a total blast. He was happy the whole time, went swimming with mom, went to playground with dad, looked at the ocean, loved staying in a hotel, watched cartoon network on cable tv.

-Babies were okay. Eva was happy and ate a ton (she really liked a steam egg dish that is popular here, mixed with rice).

-Dad took lots of pictures.

-Speaker was good. Emily went to sessions while I watched kids.

Lows:

-Forgot the diaper bag, which necessitated a drive looking for diapers and binkys.

-Eli slept miserably, and Eva not great, so Emily got about 4 hours of sleep. Emily was feeling pretty awful for the second day and a bit discouraged about sleeping arrangements.

-Sam through up in the middle of the night. I won't go into details, except to say he got about four sheets/blankets and the mattress. OK, I guess that counts as going into the details. It was pretty gruesome. Anyway, he is in a fine mood today, but church is probably off the agenda in case this was something that will recur.

So, it was a gain a "glass half full" (kids) "glass half empty" (mom) kind of day. But hopefully we'll just remember the fellowship, the ocean, and the playing in a few years. I took lots of pictures, some below.

Sam has a story for you...

2011-10-19T06:10:00.001-07:00

Sam is talking a lot more. Earlier in the week, on the way home I asked him how his day went, what had happened, etc. He started talking about Teacher Pipi who is a big bear, likes to bite bottoms, went on and on. I assumed it was a movie he'd seen. Actually, Teacher Pipi is his exercise teacher and they play lots of group games during on the games day (there's another exercise teacher, Teacher Ball, and apparently they trade off every six months). His teacher explained it all to me. Sam is able to say a lot more, although it's still sometimes hard to figure out what he is saying. We're excited that he's coming along.

He also had a kind of prayer he was saying in local language before dinner or snacks sometimes. We finally figured out what it is. It goes 感謝天感謝地感謝廚房的阿姨... "Thank you for the heavens, thank you for the earth, thank you for the auntie in the kitchen..." And then there's some thanking of the teacher, mom, and classmates. It all rhymes in the local language. It's nice that he's able to explain things. We're also at the point where if I forget a word in local language I can ask him and he may know. Not something like "nuclear reactor," but along the lines of "eagle" or "ceiling."

Sam's doing more coloring and has been on a big playdough kick. He's a fun kid.

Emily and I are still a bit wiped out from the sick kid thing. Eva's had a fever in the afternoons since Saturday. Today we took her in again, now with some blotchy skin, and she was diagnosed with roseola. We're pretty sure that this is what Eli had and Sam had it when we lived in H-Town. Anyway, it is reassuring that she is on the mend and that we have a diagnosis. Emily's day was pretty much shot taking Eva to the hospital, and Eli is coughing. I know that this is just what happens at this age, but after the scare this summer, and multiplied by two, we're pretty much ready to be done with the sick baby stage. I did tell her that at least we are planning pediatric nephrologist visits, so that's a plus.

There's not a lot else to report on the babies. Emily prompted Eli to say "goodnight" tonight and it sure sounded like "nye-nye." I have the feeling these two may talk faster than Sam. Eva is very expressive with her hands and fingers. We probably should be teaching her some infant sign language.

I'm almost done with teaching for the week. Tomorrow I have a guest lecturer so I'm pretty excited. It's just for an hour, but it will give students a change of pace and should make the class a little more relaxed for me. We're now in week six or seven. The weekend will be busier because Friday is a meeting of several schools and Saturday they're installing our president.

Nature Center

2011-10-15T23:59:00.000-07:00

There's a nature center near the hospital where we take the kids. Yesterday Eva spiked a fever, so we took her in. The doctor said it's probably just teething or a simple infection. Her ears were clear and throat was just a little red.

Em stayed with Eva and I took Sam and Eli to the little nature park nearby. It's really a fun place to go. They have a pond with ducks, a little outdoor turtle center, a bird house, a fish and critters house, and an educational center. One of the volunteers offered to show Sam and another family a toad. He gave a fun little presentation, showed us that the male toads make a croaking sound, and let Sam and the other kids watch it hop around (video below). Sam also liked the walking stick bugs, the meal worms, and some other insects. Sam also really enjoyed the hospital. He played in a little house they have in the pediatrics division with several other kids.

The weekends are proving to be enormously fun for Sam and the kids but fairly exhausting for us. We're looking forward to grandparents arriving in a few weeks. Today Sam went to church with me and had a great time. We took the bus and he really enjoyed that. His local language is coming along, so he was wowing people wherever he went (even if it was just to say "that's mine! you can't have it"). I think he's probably going to be a bit of a rock star in another year or two.

Fireworks

2011-10-10T18:39:00.000-07:00

Last night I heard the "boom boom" of fireworks starting, so I quick grabbed Sam and we went to the overlook just off campus. It's by a highway so thirty or forty people were clustered together watching. The fireworks were far off, in the center of the city, so Sam wasn't at all scared. He enjoyed it and could also see the top of the tallest building, which was lit up, and which he thought was a "castle." It was fun.

We also met the principal of an American denominational school up the mountain, really just minutes from us. I think there are probably a good four or five English-language schools here, but also some really good local ones. It was nice to meet some nearby Americans and we will look them up sometime soon.

This three-day weekend was long. It's nice to be back started on the week.

Thursday...

2011-10-06T05:29:00.001-07:00

Today's my long day. Teach three hours, chapel, teacher's meeting, lunch, then two more hours of Local Language. I am always a bit tired by the end of it. Today I used some video clips in class, which worked fairly well, and some charts I'd scanned. My language has come along, but I know I'm probably still incomprehensible a certain amount of the time. Images help a lot with that, since they facilitate discussion and move things away from just lecture.

CDC did another round of spraying on campus today, because some cases were found farther down the mountain (this is third round outside in addition to two rounds inside/outside, if you are counting). Still pretty annoying. The upside continues to be far fewer mosquitoes. Afternoon walks are downright pleasant now.

Tonight Sam's watching the Jonah movie, which is our only Christian-y movie. He really likes it, and Emily just read him several versions of the story of Jonah. This is my name in local language, so I'm thinking of buying some Jonah prints to hang here. I've always like Jonah because the story balances a realism about human hatred with a picture of divine grace.

The babies are doing well. They were both shrieking some today. They seemed generally in fine spirits. They love mosquito spraying because it means an office campus adventure for them. Today they went to the local suburb and walked around while I had class. A nice afternoon.

Tonight I discovered the National Geographic webpage. Sam watched a video about tremulation in tree frogs. He, of course, acted it out with the frog puppet he has. It is a lot of fun to watch for a father whose childhood ambition was to be a herpetologist.

We are feeling a bit more upbeat about life. The first few weeks of the semester had a lot of unknowns, so it feels good to gradually be sorting them out. This is a three day weekend for us coming up, so it will be a lot of child-watching. I also have a cold, so I know we may need some laid back kid time. I'll update if we do any special activities.

Animals!

2011-09-29T09:00:00.001-07:00

Sam's favorites this time were probably: rhinos (for their pooping), flamingos, lemurs, and elephants. Last time we did mostly inside animals. This time it was a nice day, so we did a lot of the big, outside animals.

Belated Zoo Pictures

2011-09-29T08:57:00.001-07:00

A week ago we went to the zoo and I never put pictures up. A fun day!

Our Kids are (Still) Driving us Crazy

2011-09-29T08:30:00.000-07:00

As I write this seemingly both Eva and Eli are teething. Neither one wants to sleep and the intermittent crying is driving us a bit nuts. Eva played until around 8 tonight. Sam managed to "accidentally" knock her over earlier and kept giving her slightly aggressive hugs. He balked at going to the cafeteria tonight and kept saying "no people." He eventually came around and even has a new auntie friend from it, but, wow, it has been a long day. On the other hand, everyone seems to be disease-free and thriving, so maybe I should not complain.

Other things are better. We got a book case for all of Sam's books. It's nice to have them in one place and Sam really loves being read to. Tonight I read "Knuffle Bunny." Other favorites are a book about baby owls waiting for their mom, anything zoo or animal related, and "ten monkeys." Ten Monkeys has a refrain that goes "Ten little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his [or her] head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, 'No more monkeys jumping on the bed!'" Fun stuff.

Today was a full day for me. Three hours of teaching, teachers' meeting, lunch, language classes, talked to another teacher, went to dinner. I am feeling like I'm getting more into the flow of things. I no longer have the "what will I do with three hours?" feeling. Today I lectured for about half of the class, used an activity where students did some research, and then did small groups discussions. I am feeling like teaching is manageable. Some day I will get to preaching, seminar-ing, responding, and other forms of public speaking. This is also my first time with a class of thirty, which requires a different type of interaction than ten or fifteen. It's nice to make progress. Emily's also planning to talk to a group on campus soon, so that will be her first foray into public speaking.

That's the news from here. I've been posting less recently and will probably be slowing down here for a while.

Saturday in the park continued

2011-09-17T08:14:00.001-07:00

This is how we travel...
Eli, don't eat that!
At the park, with beloved moped
Eli's shirt says "Little Brothers are Awesome"

Saturday, Saturday....

2011-09-17T07:47:00.000-07:00

Sam feeds fish, turtles, and pigeons with a boy and his mom
Eva and Eli at the park
"So big!"
Eli (with bottle of water to the right)
Smiling Eva

Today was a pretty interesting day. It was day two of at least three for spraying. Tomorrow they're coming back. Luckily, thankfully, these are only outside spraying days. However, we bought a lot of plastic bags in case we have to cover everything again. We maybe should have invested in some tarps. Last night at part of the campus retreat we learned that they'd found mosquito larvae in grates behind the men's dormitory, so that's what they are doing tomorrow. Presumably there will be more blood tests this week, and if we get the chance to do them we will, since apparently about 80% of people are asymptomatic. I think it's fairly unlikely, but several weeks ago Eli's strange episode included a high fever (not dangerously high, just normal high) and then a rash, and these are the two main symptoms for the fever.

Today we went to one of the parks we love to go to while they sprayed the campus. Sam arrived as a mom and her son were feeding the fish and turtles, so he really enjoyed being a part of that. People are really kind to him. The boy had some sort of fish food and the mom had also brought diced bala to feed to the fish. It was fun. Sam also spent a lot of time chasing pigeons. The babies alternated napping and watching everything. It's a nice park because there's a covered walkway, bathrooms, and a really beautiful lake.

Sam also had gotten a new, small plastic moped. I don't know why, but toy companies are nearly incapable of producing a sturdy motorcycle. I think it's the challenge of wheels and handlebars. One or the other is sure to break, so we knew it was only a matter of time. The moped made it through the park but then the motorized piece (where you pull it back and it goes forward) broke this afternoon. Sam was nearly inconsolable for most of the afternoon, but in the evening we gave the moped a "time out" and by night time he was philosophical about it. We reviewed the different toys he's had that have broken ("the red motorcycle, the green motorcycle..."), the bowls or cups Emily and I have broken, the lights or doors that aren't quite right, and on and on. It could almost have been a sermon on the impermeability of the world in which we live. I think after a while he had the hang of it. He still has a very funny way of saying "broken." He says it like "broke-en-ying" and it's almost tonal. I always feel bad for Emily because she tends to go to bed around the time Sam is breaking down, but then he usually gets a second wind at night, when I'm up with him. Tonight he had fun watching some tv, playing with blocks, and then took a really long bath. I'm so curious what he'll be like in the years ahead. It's a fun age.

We're into the full onslaught of classes now, so I may be writing less. I always enjoys this space for thinking through all of the things going on around us.

Spraying Campus

2011-09-15T16:09:00.000-07:00

Eva and Eli play together
Out during the fumigating
Eva and Eli enjoy tasty rice with fish bits
Yesterday I learned they were spraying campus for an infectious virus spread by mosquito. Things went fairly well, but it was another case where I always feel like I get the information about a day after I would like to have it. So yesterday I had thought they were coming because of a student who had the virus two months ago and got it somewhere else in SE Asia. Then I heard that a neighboring business (a flower place) had a person who had tested for it. Then I heard it was three people. Then I heard that two people on campus tested it for it but were asymptomatic. Then I heard it was three people...

Anyway, the fumigation itself was okay, but most of Wednesday night and yesterday were spent packing things away and then today will be spent wiping everything down again. Linda helped a lot with this, and even came back in the evening to open windows and wipe everything of before we came back with the babies.

I asked the CDC person what chemical they were using yesterday, and she didn't know, but she did arrange to have the information given to us after the fact. It's really not a bad pesticide, so I think probably the benefit outweighs the harm, but all a bit frustrating.

Re-retreating, mid-autumn festival

2011-09-11T05:01:00.000-07:00

Sam talks to a new friend after church (he's looking at car pictures on her phone)
Sunday school!
Ready to go! (Sam with robot)
Pomelo mouse (from nursery school)

Yesterday I went to half of the teachers' retreat for our school. When I realized that we only had three hours planned this morning, but that it would cause a good eighteen hours of grief for Emily (from last night to this afternoon) I decided to come back with another teacher last night. A good decision! As I write this Emily is sleeping and Sam is looking to head towards and early bedtime.

It's mid-autumn festival here. We've been feasting on moon cakes (cakes filled with different types of paste: red bean, sesame, peanuts, egg, even chocolate), Sam decorated a pomelo at school, and the weather is just beginning to change.

Church was fun today. Sam went to his regular Sunday School class and then enjoyed playing with other kids and talking to some adults after church. He still sometimes resists talking to new people, but warms up quickly once he gets to know the person. He's just reaching an age where he's beginning to really be able to play with other kids. Yesterday he played in a wading pool with some neighbors he likes a lot and today he enjoyed talking to some of the other boys.

He also went to the potty by himself today, although he went into the women's bathroom and then got upset when he didn't know how to get his pants and shoes back on! He's also basically now pacifier free. Emily thinks maybe it was too early. He's sucking on his shirt some now. On the other hand, I remember reading that this is really the age where you can explain why they should stop and I don't want to still be dealing with this a year from now.

Start of New School Year

2011-09-06T08:01:00.001-07:00

The semester starts a week from Thursday. There are two retreats over the next two weekends. I'm fairly excited about this year, because I can be in with both feet. In the past I had to balance participation against language study and family transitions (arrival, pregnancy, new babies). I'm going to try to get to most of both retreats. Weekends are harder for us, but Emily's planning to rely on some other spouses to help with bedtime, which is a big relief.

I'm feeling a bit more confident about teaching, although I know I'll have up and down days. This semester I'm going to use google groups and create a group for each class. Most of my challenges in teaching in another language relate to getting feedback and figuring out how much the class understands. With these groups I can create discussion boards to which they can post. I can also post information on topics. So if I am worried about plagiarism I can post resources. If I do a lecture on different organizations I can put up the weblinks. If I do group reports I can have them share some of their basic materials. I can also send lecture notes to the whole class via email. I think it will up communication. I'll have three classes. The two main ones have 30 and 18 students and then I'm co-teaching a course with 12. I think it will be manageable. However, since I have so many students I probably won't be able to grade the final papers myself (which I tried this semester, and worked, but took a really long time).

The school should have more equilibrium this year than in the past. There are about a dozen core teachers. One is on sabbatical and we have one new teacher, so it's relatively little turnover compared to the past. I'm hopeful that things will be a little calmer.

We're starting to think about plans for the next year. We want to be settled in P-town for the bulk of next fall, but we're going to try to spend a fair amount of time with family also. The hope is that we can get a month during the summer with each family unit and then also have them come during the fall, and also do Christmas with the two families. Logistics will be a little hard to figure out.

Incentives and Disincetives

2011-09-06T07:49:00.000-07:00

With Sam we're continuing to tinker with incentives and disincentives. He has a star board (we draw stars on a small white board Emily has) and after he gets six stars he gets a special reward, usually a Kinder Egg. These are German eggs where there's a small toy inside and the egg has a kind of chocolate coating. He doesn't get totally sugared out and they aren't expensive, but he really likes them. This works pretty well. The two things we're working on now are hand-washing and tooth-brushing.

We're also doing time-outs, which work fairly well. Usually it's just for a few minutes, and we now are as likely to give the offending toy a time out as we are to give Sam a time out. So if he throws a stuffed animal too close to a sibling, the animal gets a time out. Typically, Sam gets them in the morning or evening when he's tired and needs a little alone time.

We're also working on some of the bigger life lessons. Sam left a beloved new motorcycle at church on Sunday and it just disappeared at some point. The rest of the day, about every hour or two he would cry and say "motorcycle," and then would be back to normal in a few minutes. Not a fun lesson, but a basic problem in life: things don't last.

The harder areas are where an infraction is suspected but not seen. Usually this comes when we hear a "thump" and then a baby cry and come out to see Sam sitting by the baby. Did he push the baby? Did the baby fall? Unfortunately, none of our children are great expert witnesses at this point. Today I gave Sam a time out because all signs pointed to play that was too rough. Then, his teacher told Emily that today whenever he fell down at school he would say "s/he pushed me!" in local language even if no one pushed him. It's hard to be a social being. Sam's really coming along, but it takes a while.

On a related note, he's especially snuggly lately. He tells us he loves us about a hundred times a day. I know it's something I say to him a lot, but I think he also gets it at school and it's started to stick. It's very endearing. He's a fun kid.

University Research Hospital 2

2011-08-30T06:15:00.000-07:00

We did our second trip to URH today, again joined by one of the other teachers. It was a good visit. They took blood, but we won't get results until tomorrow or the next day. They did urine also, so we are hoping to learn more from that. It was mostly an uneventful trip.

Emily and I really enjoyed the day out with just Eva. We went to the national church office and enjoyed talking to people there. It's nice when someone else holds the baby, and sings, laughs, and plays with her. Eva loved the attention. At the metro, Emily and I parted ways--she went home to feed Eli and I went to get Sam.

This was Sam's first day of the strawberry class at school. It doesn't mean a big change, but some small ones (new classroom, shoes and bag go in another place). He seemed very happy coming home. He loves to point out trucks. When we got back home, another teacher was already there and we were soon joined by another coworker (Sam was very happy to see her). It's hard to make sure everyone gets the attention they need, but they all seem to be doing okay.

I'll update in the comments when we get results back. Sorry there haven't been any pictures lately.

2/5

2011-08-27T05:20:00.001-07:00

We're at 60% power here, as Eli's developed a fever and Emily threw up after class today. Anyway, it was an exciting day. Eli spiked a fever in the morning, up to around 102.5. After lunch I took him to the local hospital. They listened to his lungs and x-rayed him. It was hard to get a clear picture, but they think he has bronchitis or a very mild pneumonia. In the meantime, Emily threw up, so I picked up her and Sam on the way home.

Our internet at home is down. Our phone wasn't working, then they fixed that but messed up the internet. I've actually tried to get rid of the phone line before, because it seems to cause more trouble than it is worth. Somehow our wiring is mixed with the neighbors. They previously ran a wire through our windowpane (!) to disentagle our phone from the neighbors', but we're now clearly re-entagled. Originally they were going to wait until Monday to come back, but I talked them into tomorrow ("badgered" is closer to the truth, but since we've been through this twice before, I thought it was worth it). Not the world's biggest problem, but frustrating sincde the weekend is often when we have time to talk to family.

The weekend is looking a little less clear now. Originally we were to go swimming with the family of the two girls I mentioned. Sunday is the baptism. If Eli and Emily perk up, we'll probably be okay. I may go swimming with Sam and leave Emily home with the babies. We'll see.

I also found some second hand movies, so Sam is watching a Disney movie about dog astronauts (!!??). Another teacher stopped over tonight, which made the evening hours nicer. Chiungling made some awesome pumpkin/rice based baby food. People here don't really used canned baby food, so the babies get pretty much all home-made food.

Oh, and a typhoon may be coming through tomorrow or the next day. We're hoping it's mild.

End of the Summer

2011-08-25T21:02:00.003-07:00

Our summer is wrapping up here. It's hard to believe that it's coming to a close. Eva's still in the 7.5/7.6 range, which shows great improvement. She is a pretty happy baby. She and Sam seem to have a special bond and she lights up when she seems him.

Sam is a very funny toddler. Last night two girls on campus (ages 5 and 7) came over, and he had a great time playing with them. Sam has now inherited a large horde of toys. It began with an old friend, who passed on many blocks and toys from his son, then the neighbors who added various vehicles and trains and whatnot, and then Sam gets little gifts from time to time and his mom is a sucker for a puzzle, book, or motorcycle. Now Sam is a one-man entertainment enterprise. I think we're resigned to the fact that our living room probably will be a baby-feeding/toddler-playing room for another couple of years.

A few nights ago we started explaining the baptism to Sam. I'm a little nervous because the sanctuary seats probably four or five hundred people and I don't know what he'll make of so many people. Last week we went up and peeked in. We've been trying to explain what will happen. We started showing him pictures from the blog of him as a baby, and at first he insisted that they were Eli. However, as the baby added hair, walked, and looked more like Sam he accepted that it was him as a baby. We explained that he is already baptized but that it will be fun for the whole family. We'll check back in to see what he makes of it. We try to talk to him a lot and he loves to talk to people. He is getting a better vocabularly, although he still sounds like a toddler.

To lure him out to the car in the morning the last few days, I've been promising him that we'd look at bugs. Today we saw two spiders, one of the very large "golden orb" spiders that (counting legs) is probably six or seven inches in length, as well as a hunter spider, some millipedes, and blue-tailed lizards. It made him very happy and it gives him a conversation piece when he gets to school. Next week he officially moves up to the "strawberry" class. We always feel a little guilty about having him in nursery school, but he likes it a lot and it's let him really be a part of things here. We want him to feel at home in both cultures for as long as we can (I know eventually we may move home or to the American school). The timing is working out well, since 2-5 seems to give a good basis.

Eli is coming along also. It was funny to look at the old blog posts because Sam was a better cruiser and took steps earlier, but I don't think he was such a strong crawler or quite so fast going from his knees to his feet. Eli has the balance and power to stand up directly now, without holding anything. He is also very smiley, with his six teeth. He's still a little harder to get to bed, and more resistant on giving up nursing. Oh well. They both like looking at books, and they both enjoy watching Sam play. They enjoy each other also.

Otherwise things are okay. I'm starting three weeks off from language. A week needs to go to class prep and probably two weeks need to go to finishing up various projects.

And just regular life takes time also. We need to get the car inspected, do dental check-ups, should probably do physicals, etc., etc. Emily's working on a paper submission and dissertation. She paid tuition on-line yesterday. Today's her last day of class. I'm trying to decide a little bit what to do on language. I may try to get an on-campus tutor if our langauge won't give us its discounted rate (since we're taking fewer hours). This might actuallyl be better, because it would give me more church-y vocab.

This semester I'm teaching three classes. I'm trying to figure out how to set them up well. Our campus doesn't have course software, so I may use one of the google programs. I want to do something where I can ask a question and have students post answers to an online course discussion group. I also want to invite some other teachers to talk about topics of interest. I'm still working on courses, but they seem to be coming along slowly.

That's the news from here. I'm writing this having dropped Sam off, and am now getting coffee. Part of the reason I started this blog is that my memory has never been great. I lose names and details fairly easily, so it's nice to have something like this to jog my memory or remind me of how a time felt. I find I've already forgotten a lot of the specifics on baby Sam--his teething, how the transition to walking went, etc. So it's nice to have this place to look back and see how things were. I'll try to post pictures of the baptism soon (I think there may even be video). More to follow....

Another good blood test

2011-08-22T05:45:00.000-07:00

I went to Local Hospital tonight. This is one of the three places we've gone to for help and it has the doctor who initially checked Eva's blood and admitted her for re-hydration.

He took blood tonight. He kept insisting that he didn't think we should take blood too much, and I tried to remind him we'd only taken it once in the last five weeks. She's been off the medicine she was given, which is great for B's but can mess with the stomach. Her numbers were all in the normal range, which is a good sign. I think this tilts it towards not B's, but I suppose it's possible she has a mild case. Either way, it means it's unlikely this will be a major challenge we're facing.

We have another appointment a week from tomorrow at University Hospital. We'll probably do blood and urine there one more time to make sure she's doing fine without medicine.

This has been a very strange episode. One of the things I did a few weeks ago was to join the sole internet group for patients with B's. It's really a hard disease, so I am having a little bit of survivor's guilt. A new member described how their son can't handle the main medicine used to treat it and is in the NICU on continuous IV's. It's made me a lot more aware of the burden of parenting and of the struggles people live with.

Not much new...

2011-08-18T22:35:00.001-07:00

We're heading into the last weeks of August! We're pretty excited about this. I think I'm going to stop language for a few weeks as I prep for the new semester. Emily and I probably need a day trip sometime also. The start of the semester is always a little rough. There are a couple of overnight retreats (faculty, student) followed by various chapel services, informational meetings, etc., and then the kick off of classes. This year I'm supposed to be close to full time, so I'll be doing more preaching, advising, tutorials, and the like. I think it will be okay. In some ways it's been hard to be only one foot into the commmunity. This year I'm going to really put my time into campus life.

I'm also a bit behind now on projects that were supposed to be finished. I think a lot of this is parenthood. I was telling a student I know that it used to be I could get a lot of work done between 9-2 at night, and now anything after five just doesn't go.

Eva is at a record setting (for her) 7.45 kg. I haven't checked out the weight charts, but it should take her out of the 1-5% category where she's been. We're hopeful about it, at least. It means that stopping the medicine hasn't led to a sudden drop in appetite or weight. Our next doctor visits are the coming Monday or Tuesday (forget which) and then a week later. The first is the local hospital and the second is the university research hospital.

I wish I had more to share, but that's it! The picture is one I took a few weeks ago.

University Research Hospital

2011-08-15T19:46:00.000-07:00

I just took the file from Local Hospital and Local Research Hospital to University Research Hospital and met with a pediatrician/nephrologist. He said that it's strange that her electrolytes have bounced back quickly. He said the hypokalemia suggested B's, but the quick bounce back is an indicator against it. We're going to cut her medicine for two weeks and see how she does.

I think it may have been a combination of moving to hard food, bad teething, and sharing with her brother. I still can't figure this one out, but the doctor today said that her early growth was very normal and her bounce back in the last month has been very healthy. Anyway, some good news here. Barb may be right that it was eating related. We were tricked a little because she never really stopped eating, she just ate less and without much energy. If she's back to normal, I think we'll be okay with not knowing what it came from.

Saturday, O Saturday

2011-08-13T04:44:00.000-07:00

We aren't sure yet how today was for the kids. On paper, it was another awesome day. Sam saw Cars 2 in 3D, his first cinema viewing experience. He got a plastic cup with an awesome Lightning McQueen sports car on it. Emily did some shopping. Lunch was tasty. All in all a good day.

[Minority report: Sam whined most of the day, the babies didn't sleep, dinner was a bit of a bust, Mom is tired.]

The highlight of the day though was perhaps bath time, pictured here in its full frenetic glory.

People are Messing With Us

2011-08-12T04:35:00.000-07:00

So today I emailed the doctor and he sent back a ppt with Eva's electrolyte levels. The stinker's levels look entirely normal. I can't tell if this is because of the medication or if this has just been a big error. Good grief! More info to follow as we hear it. I may take this to the other hospital on Tuesday. All things in time...

Updates

2011-08-11T08:49:00.001-07:00

No news on the genetic report or the blood test, but we hope we'll at least get blood results back soon.

Eva's still 7.2kg. She seems happy and healthy.

Next Tuesday we're going to University Research Hospital. It's an earlier appointment, so I may cab it with Eva and we're meeting a coworker whose husband works at the hospital. Part of our goal is also to keep people in the loop so that they know what we're up to.

The week after that is the regular pediatrician visit.

We're continuing to learn and read. I've posted several questions to the main B's internet group. It's been helpful in learning about others' experiences. If Eva does have it, her form seems to be milder than many. One of the only ones with a baby who has responded has a kid with the neonatal form. They've had to deal with feeding tubes and continuous vomiting and all manner of challenges. I think part of the reason this freaked me out initially is that there is such a wide range of experiences. Emily also talked to her friend Betsy today, and her husband had a kidney transplant some time back. Obviously, this is not the direction we're hoping to go, but it appears to be the worst case scenario. It's easy to forget that what we are dealing with is much milder than what many people face in daily life. This is all to say that we think Eva is doing fine and that things are becoming a little clearer and a little more normal to us. We're still hoping it's a big mix up and only time will tell.

It was a fun day with Sam today. My language classes got moved around, so I asked one of my teachers if we could pick up Sam and go to the park for an hour of class. Sam had fun looking at turtles in a reservoir and we went to the playground and he also was able to watch people playing baseball, basketball, and soccer. He chatted amicably the whole time and blew a kiss to the teacher when he left. His language skills are really coming along and he seems very happy. Tonight Emily built a "zoo" for him with blocks and he went to bed happy and tired. We're hoping to perhaps take him to his first movie in a theater this weekend. Cars 2 is out, if we can get tickets. We think he's ready, but he may still be a little little.

Local Research Hospital

2011-08-09T06:13:00.000-07:00

Today we visited Local Research Hospital, which has a big name nephrologist who's treated lots of folk with B's. (I'm calling this Local Research Hospital because it's about a half hour away; next week we visit University Research Hospital, which is downtown.) This is the hospital that's doing the genetic research for us, so hopefully it may personalize the data for them.

It was a pretty funny meeting. Nanny Linda drove us there, which was very nice. We found the main office for the doctors, and it looked about how I hoped it would look. There was a hall of offices in one direction and a big pit of cubicles in the other. Several tables were piled high with copies of nephrology journals and kidney encyclopedias. We first met the pediatrician, who's doing a PhD under the main doctor, and then the main doctor showed up just a little later. He was finishing one meeting and on the way to the next. He kind of cracked me up, as almost a doctor stereotype. He introduced himself, reviewed a chart he'd made, answered his phone, gave his apologies, and left. Anyway, it was a funny encounter. The pediatrician talked t0 us more, showed us a chart they'd made based on Eva's blood tests that I sent, and got us registered and took blood. The urine test was a failure--they put the bag on after she'd gotten her blood taken, so I don't think she had any pee left to give at that point, and the bag wasn't sticking right. So we have to do that part tomorrow, but we can have it sent to the hospital.

I'm still not sure what to make of it all. This hospital appears to be the place to go for B's. I think they have more than 100 people they've worked with who have one of the two major kidney disorders (B's is maybe 30-40 people). This is also encouraging because it means, as I've suspected, that B's isn't really one in a million. It's probably one in a couple of hundred thousand, but just hasn't been diagnosed widely. This is probably a good place to find patients also, because where we are is: (1) a pretty big island with (2) a national health care system. So all of the patients are identifiable and will get funneled to a few hospitals in the city. In the States, you have dozens of hospitals per state, lots of confidentiality issues (it's difficult to share resources), and it's harder to fund rare disease research. Of course, there are drawbacks here, but I'm hoping if we can work with both systems we can get the help we need.

We're still not sure what to do with the medicine she's taking. As we read more, I can see why it is widely prescribed, and on the website it sounds like most people with B's take it. At the same time, I'd like to find out more about dosages, whether we can cycle off of it, mix it with food, etc. We're going to cut the dosage in half until we get the blood results.

Anyway, this is what we know now. Next week we'll see an endocrinologist. I'm hoping we get results soon, but it could still be a while.

Family Portrait!

2011-08-08T01:10:00.000-07:00

We finally got a family portrait. Above are several versions of it (we took it on a white screen and they inserted these backgrounds later). We also have individual images for our visas. This may be a new family tradition. This was another picture that was a little challenging to take. Sam kept trying to flash the ubiquitous "v" for victory and Eva kept looking over at him. I had to rock her and back and forth so she'd face forward while Emily kept yelling at Sam between smiles. But the portrait turned out great, so I guess it was worth it!

Father's Day #2

2011-08-07T06:41:00.000-07:00

Here they are in.... shoes! Yes, it's shoe season for the babies.
Here is Sam styling in his retro-looking toddler's swimming suit. We may be able to finance our retirement by selling this picture back to him when he is an adult.

Eli's plan for pretty much every day is: stand up sit down (repeat nine million times)
So, it's 8/8, or local father's day tomorrow. Emily kind of has already given me a delightful father's day today, with long nap, pool trip for Sam, and much togetherness time.

Bubbles

2011-08-07T06:32:00.003-07:00

On Thursday (I think it was Thursday), the accountant on campus who has become our adoptive aunt came over and played with Sam. She'd brought a bubble wand. He had a blast.

Oh Saturday

2011-08-06T05:05:00.000-07:00

Today was one of those Saturdays where we struggled with how much to do. Emily had wanted to go to the library and get some books for Sam. We had a late start out the door, and then made some wrong turns and couldn't find the library. We threw in the towel and went out for a long lunch instead. The babies got a bit of a stroll. When we came home Sam took a nap (he actually fell asleep in the car) and I took the babies for a longer walk, during which they slept. This was good because it meant they lasted longer, and now they (and hopefully Emily) are asleep.

Eva's looking good. She was 7kg again today. I just talked to the coworker's husband, and he's going to recommend a pediatric endocrinologist to us. This makes sense to me, although I wouldn't have thought of it. If it's not B's, then an endocrinologist may be able to make sense of blood levels and any hormonal questions. I still think it could be something else. A few days ago I read about a situation in 1980 where the ingredients in some baby formula led to a condition that mimicked B's (and helped prompt reforms in how baby food is made and regulated). Anyway, all things in time.

We've had beautiful weather the last few days. Today was blue skies and windy--a really nice day.

Nothing to see here folks...

2011-08-04T06:13:00.000-07:00

We are plodding along. Beloved cat Theo passed away recently, so I was bummed about that yesterday and today. He was a very distinctive cat. We sometimes joked that he possessed a mix of traits from me and Emily: small head on huge body, black hair but fine and soft, a delicate meow and surprising speed. He liked to greet people at the door, but wasn't exactly an extrovert. Anyway, he was a good cat and we miss him. His life didn't start out great and he had some handicaps along the way. We met him near a golf course and left him in rural Ohio. I mostly remember him sitting on my chest and purring. Rest well furry friend...

On other news... we are re-engaging, ratcheting up, and escalating our medical inquiries. I just wrote to a friend of a friend in the States who is a nephrologist to ask for any advice they have (in English!) and we have an appointment with the main local expert I've been able to find for Tuesday. I also have written to a coworker whose husband is at the main national hospital. So, we may not have results soon, but at least we'll have some people who are experts and can review Eva's file with us. Yes, it's a little overwhelming, but probably less overwhelming than doing nothing for the next six weeks or so. Barb said she'd look into babies and weight gain, which also sounded promising.

That's our life. I feel like it's August and we should be enjoying leisurely travel and lots of time relaxing, and instead it's just a sprint of a month. I did five hours of class today. On the other hand, all the children are enjoying themselves. Sam is reading a book nearby with running commentary in local language: "He's wearing shoes... You're not wearing a hat?" I still admire his crisp little tones. It's the little cloth book with a mouse where you can practice tying strings, zipping and unzipping, fastening buttons, putting things in pockets, etc. This has been a good week for Sam because there's been a huge tree-removal truck on campus several days pruning and typhoon-readying the campus. Tonight a coworker came over and did bubbles with him.

I'm doing okay. I've started a novel, so that it a nice way to escape a bit. I have to be careful when I start books, but now seems like an okay time. I also have some overdue projects I hope to work on tomorrow. That's what we're up to.

Our Kids are Driving us Crazy

2011-07-31T06:53:00.001-07:00

So, Eva and Eli woke up at 5, after several night wake-ups. (Emily didn't take well to them waking up so early, but we'll just leave it at that.) I took them around 5:30, got them to nap briefly, handed them off at 8:30, slept to 10:20 myself, went to church. Then I took a huge nap with Sam (I slept like two hours, but Sam slept four hours--so not at all tired.) Then Emily took a nap while I was with Sam. Now we three bigger ones are up and the twins are down. Pure craziness. A while ago I saw a review of a popular children't book out now called "Go the F__ to Sleep." The hip reviews I have all seen scold the passive aggressiveness of the book, the anti-child tendencies, etc., etc., but what they forget is that not sleeping will make you crazy. It will make you crazy. There's a reason bad people use it against prisoners, why it's included in military training, etc., etc. It will make you crazy. This is one of the great mysteries of parenting, that you can love someone so much and want nothing so much as to be able to help them, but they have their own wants and needs.

OK, that's out of my system now.

The day was otherwise okay. Skipping the sleep drama, we were a picture of nuclear family bliss. We enjoyed church. We had a trip to the park. The evening has included viewings of Underdog and Chicken Little. A coworker and his wife and daughter stopped over in the afternoon. Sam's wearing his moped helmet and dancing around pantsless (last night he even slept without a diaper with no problems). A bath is in the future. From the happier perspective of evening (after naps and dinner), it was a fine day, solid parenting, etc.

Onto Eva. The little stinker is 6.6 again. What are you doing to us Eva?! The flip side is that she is very cute, alert, responsive, friendly. She was melting hearts at church today. She smiled her way through several sets of arms and made many new friends. Tuesday we go to the hospital to draw blood and find out what we can find out. Still not sure of an exact date on the genetic report, but the more I read the happier I am that we will soon (eventually?) get real certainty on this.

And now some recent pictures (blogger was acting up the last time I posted).

Blocks, walking, and more

2011-07-28T19:34:00.001-07:00

A busy few days here. Eli's pulling up really well and clearly wants to walk. They're nine months today, and both show great advances in the last few weeks. Eva's articulating more and has said "da da" some the last few days.

Emily's just put shoes on each of them--it's a lot of fun and I'll post pictures soon.

Sam and I have been doing blocks. We have some of the big plastic ones. The more we play with them the more we can do. Recently we built a tower as tall as me and we've experimented with steps and different features.

Eva's driving us nuts with the weight, however. Today she is again in the 6.6/6.7 range, which means she's essentially where she was three months ago :( Tomorrow she'll have been out of the hospital two weeks. On Tuesday we go for the two week check up. We'd really like results soon. I kind of wish they hand't given us the initial diagnosis, but I'm glad they can do the testing. Today I read it's nearly impossible to get this testing in the States.

On the train...

2011-07-25T01:05:00.001-07:00

Today was my first day doing a one-day trip to center city for a committee meeting. On the one hand these meetings are good experience--a mix of two languages, lots of terminology I don't know, a chance to get to know people from different parts of the island, etc. On the other hand, I always struggle with the business vocab (words like "awning," "utilities," etc.) and I'm not able to contribute a lot to the questions at hand. Stilll, I'm almost back home and door-to-door it'll have been about eight hours. I like the high speed train.

Other good news... Eva's up to 6.6 kg! Yes, this makes us very happy. I don't know what's doing it. I keep hoping this was all just teething. She's already got two in and I think the next two will be in soon. She's eating tons of food and we're trying lots of potassium rich things, just in case. I'm getting slightly better at giving medicine, but, wow, it would be really nice if we don't have to inject medicines two a day (or more) for the foreseeable future.

I'm also trying to figure out how timing will affect all of this. In theory, when they're doing the testing they should be starting with the likeliest syndrome and then moving on to the others, something like 3, 1, 2, 4, 5 and then G's. If it takes a few weeks it may mean they're not finding anything. I think Emily and I were both ready to believe she had this the last few days, but now, to borrow the words of my cousin Mary, maybe she was just faking it.

We still feel like we're a little bit rocky at this whole parenting thing. Emily texted me today because she had trouble getting Sam to go to school. We spent a fair amount of time together yesterday, but it is hard to get one on one with each kid, have a house that isn't a total pit, and do some work. And we're feelilng a bit distracted with daily life right now.

I think we could use a vacation. Maybe one weekend we could hop the high speed train out of town and get a couple of days somewhere nice. I'm not quite sure how this would look, but I'm thinking it would be good for our state of mind.

Saturday at home

2011-07-23T07:15:00.000-07:00

It was a good Saturday. Sam: took a walk, played with play-dough, played with trains (you can see the track above), played with cars, played with blocks, took a long nap, watched "Cars," pasta for dinner, went swimming with mom. Not a bad day at all. The house even looks okay. Everyone ate well today. Tomorrow's church, which should be fun, followed by a quick trip to the local market and Emily wants to check out a nearby baby store.

Waiting, waiting

2011-07-22T19:25:00.000-07:00

Lately I've been singing this song to myself. It's a Taize song they sing in chapel here. It probably makes the most sense during Advent, but in a sense we're living in Advent right now.

Good things: it's a beautiful sunny day to day, we're getting over our colds, I did some reading yesterday and Emily went to class, took a walk with Sam and Eli this morning, Emily's going to swim with Sam later, found a good online group that knows about what B's looks like for people with it.

However, Eva's gone from 6.8 to 6.5kg which is making us a little nervous. If she goes down to 6.3 we probably should take her in for an IV. Not the end of the world, but obviously would be nice if we didn't have to go in that direction. We're trying a wider range of potassium rich foods: carrots, prunes, grape juice, etc. All are supposed to be good.

I'm off to do play-dough with Sam. More later!

Recovering

2011-07-21T08:05:00.000-07:00

It's been a rough summer for the family! I heard today my brother went into the hospital with chest pains. Results all came back fine, but another scare on top of several this summer. And not just scary in the past-tense, but in the ongoing, progressive sense.

The upside is that Eva is eating like a champ. I tried a prune-banana-formula gruel yesterday that she ate two bowls of! Sam had a good day also. He played trains tonight, was doing some sort of story with his alligator and monkey.

The last two nights Sam's also offered some interesting thoughts on his pooping. Yesterday he said "not a cockroach... a poop!" Tonight it was "nice to see you!" when Emily flushed it. It's pretty fun watching the wheels churn in that hard little head. I told Barb and Randy that the other day there was thunder outside and I told him it was thunder, but then a few minutes later he came over and explained he wasn't scared because it was "Underdog!" (a move he's been watching lately). Oh, such an interesting world.

I went to language class today. It was good to be back in it again and it was nice to have some time to practice medical terms and also to be immersed in non-medical things for a while. I really like the people here a lot. I think they really understand basic human struggle. One of my teachers lost a brother to a kidney disease and a sister to a stomach illness. This all happened many years ago, but I could tell it was still close to her. She talked about how she and her siblings and their children were all tested for the kidney disease and four of the five had it.

We're still in the middle of things here but the pace has slowed a bit and we're having a little more time to put things back together. People have been very nice to us and we're grateful for the community we have. We'll check in again soon. Jonathan

Check-up

2011-07-19T01:09:00.000-07:00

Today was Eva's check-up. They decided not to do another blood test, just because she had several last week. I'd prepared questions, but then the doctor did a fairly good job of anticipating them. He showed us Eva's blood results from Saturday, when she'd been in the hospital on IV's for almost the whole week. Her sodium and potassium were in the lower end of the normal range, she had slightly low magnesium (which can be a symptom), and she had very high aldosterone levels. I can see why B's is their main guess/diagnosis. The doctor said it should take a week or two to test the blood. I think they basically test each type of B's syndrome, looking at the associated mutations. But then there are probably strains that haven't been identified and there are also people who have the same symptoms (and follow the same basic therapy) but don't show up in the genetic screening. And no doubt there are also many, many people who have just been misdiagnosed (here's hoping).

I'm wanting to blow off language study for the rest of the summer. I'm going to try to stick with it in July, but Emily and I may eventually want to evaluate how much more stress our summer can contain.

Thank you all for following along. We're doing okay. I'm still just tired. When I deal with situations like this, it can really keep me up. I think I've now emailed those who don't read this blog or facebook to let them know what we're working on. I'm grateful for the communities here. I am discovering how patients came to be patients, even if I am feeling a bit impatient with it all.

Two More Weeks

2011-07-18T04:30:00.001-07:00

So... I misunderstood when we'd get lab results back. Tomorrow is just a check-up and it may be two weeks before we know for sure about the diagnosis. I'm trying to remain relaxed and calm about this, but of course it is driving me nuts and I'd really, really like to know immediately.

That said, patience is a virtue and hopefully this will give us a little time to think, reassemble ourselves, and return to some sort of normal. I keep trying to remind myself that this is not an end of the world diagnosis and that the main thing is just that our beloved daughter is back to her normal, smiling self, none the worse for the wear.

I apologize to those of you who also thought you'd have a twenty-four hour wait. We'll try to mellow out a bit on our end but to share information as soon as we receive it.

We're out!

2011-07-16T06:36:00.001-07:00

I actually wrote this post this morning, but somehow deleted it and apparently there's no way to "undo" on the app I was using.

Funny anecdote: Emily was searching for images of the syndrome and several pictures of Eva came up in Google from my last post, which I think shows just how rare this is. I quickly removed the word from the post, so hopefully they will disappear.

Getting out of the hospital was relatively smooth, aided by Sophia, a colleague's daughter. She helped us finagle the hospital-->car-->lunch-->home transition. The twins went to bed early but Sam took a big nap, so we could be up for a while. I think tomorrow it will just be and Sam and/or Eli at church. Emily and Eva get the day to rest.

That's our news. We're both still trying to make sense of this very weird week. We're looking forward to some sort of resolution on Tuesday and are thankful for supportive family and friends.

Day 5

2011-07-15T03:35:00.001-07:00

Eva's really looking a lot better now. She's neither too thin nor puffed up. I'm with her now and Emily and Sam will come by later. This morning they took blood for the additional genetic tests and put another IV in. Her electrolytes look good.

They've given us an initial diagnosis of B______'s syndrome. I'm still a little skeptical. As nearly as I can understand, it's a set of several related conditions where the kidneys expel too much of some vitamins (potassium) or salt. The type she'd have is type three, or classical B's, which is the least severe and essentially requires some drugs. If we keep a close eye on it, it shouldn't harm her development at all and by adulthood she'd be fine. This is my take on it, but I still am reading and, honestly, the writing on B's all reads like a chemistry textbook. It's rare enough that I don't think they even know how common it is. One in a million? A hundred thousand?

To be honest, I'm also still thinking it is probably something else. With something so rare, I think it's as likely this is a combination of the common (dehrydration and teething) and the slightly less common (urinary tract infection?) or somewhat rare (perhaps something environmental) rather than the truly rare. It's also possible something turned up as a false positive. Anyways, we're getting used to the idea of this. It helps to have nice doctors and a good environment and support community. We're trying to communicate with everyone as much as possible. We won't know on any of this definitively until Tuesday. If it is B's, I know there are online community groups and some other resources, and we'd try to find a specialist on it here or in the States just to get a sense of what's involved.

That's the main news. We're doing all right but are a bit tired. I have a tought time getting Sam to bed and doing Eli's feedings. We're very grateful for our awesome nanny, because we would be toast without her. Sam seems basically happy. He asked for Emily a couple of times. He and Eli still see Emily everyday, but splitting things up is definitely a hassel. We're glad we have a hospital that is very close and not too crowded. Being off the main line means we haven't been overwhelmed by visitors. I'll follow up with more later.

Day 4

2011-07-14T02:19:00.001-07:00

We're in the hospital now and Eva is looking a LOT better. She was smiling when I came in. She sits up for long periods of time. She is back to her weight from a month ago, although she's still a little puffy. For the last three days we've been in a shared room (although empty the first night) but today we moved to a single room. It's a lot nicer, and I napped with Eva this afternoon. The last two nights our roommate has been a kid with a nebulizer who's in a fair amount of pain, so not super restful. At the same time, Eva's been sleeping lots and lots.

When I came in a doctor was talking to Emily. One of our goals is to try to explain as much as we can as often as we can so that everyone gets the picture. We think this was just slow weight loss because of teething pains. I think Emily and Linda did a good job of keeping her fed and drinking, so there was no crisis, just this continuous loss of weight. We were tricked by several other aspects also. Sam had a period where he leaned up. Eva never had a fever, never threw up, never cried a lot. She was always a little more serious than Eli, so it's not as if she went from continuous smile to the pursed mouth. Anyway, she seems much better now. I think here hospitals are also faster to take people in. Emily was in the hospital for less than three days when she gave birth to Sam, but Eva will get at least five days for dehrydation. It also means that probably we need to be a little less panicked by the thought of a hospital stay here. It's a more common thing and not always a sign of extreme illness.

This morning we also did an MRI. Eva was close to sleep anyways, and they gave her some medicine, and she did fine through the MRI. The info we get back from that should be reassuring in terms of making sure she's still hitting her marks for development. But I am feeling a lot more reassured and she seems fairly sturdy today. Initially we were to leave tomorrow, but they want to do the test for the two rare syndromes just to be sure, but we're thinking that the symptoms are not a close match.

One of our language teachers came by for an hour today also. It was fun to see her. She held Eva and fed her some (picture below). It made us happy to have her around. She's probably one of the most interesting people we know. Her life hasn't been easy, and she can be a little critical, but she also has a totally different way of looking at life.

Emily's saying that Eva Helen reminds her a little of her grandma, who would get her teeth adjusted and then have trouble eating for a while. It was a funny observation.

What a strange few days these have been! The truth is the twins were pretty healthy up until now, which may have also been a piece of why this seemed to surprise us so much. This parenthood thing is really a lot more responsibility than we realized! I know this probably but won't be our last hospital visit, but I wouldn't mind another relatively calm spell for a while. And it may help us to appreciate that as much work as these three are, things could really be a lot more challenging.

(The pictures are a little blotchy because I shot this off my little tablet computer)

Day 3

2011-07-13T05:08:00.001-07:00

This has been a bit of a funny day. Now that Emily isn’t feeding Eva every two hours, I’m trying to get Eli back on his regular feeding schedule (late evening and then early morning). Today was Sam’s performance at the nursery school. I went to that and then spent the afternoon with Eva.

Eva still looks a little funny. Her eyes are puffy and she seems to have slept most of the morning through about two o’clock. For about an hour, she lay on my chest and we both rested. I know it’s been a trial for her, and I hope that she’s getting rested. We can now indeed feel the front bottom teeth and I think one has broken the surface. I’m still really hoping that this was the problem the whole time. She seems to be in good spirits. She’s laughing again and doesn’t object to tummy time, and is back to carefully examining everything she can get her hands on. Right now she’s playing by the bed looking at one of those crinkly kids’ books.

For Eva, this was a rest day in terms of exams. The MRI opens again tomorrow and they gave her a day off from blood exams. We’re really grateful for this actually, because I think she’s still recouping and it wouldn’t hurt to have some time to eat, sleep, and get a bit more intentional time. I think we do a good job caring for three kids, but I do feel bad that sometimes it’s harder to give the unlimited attention each probably needs from time to time.

The loving older brother visits
Gnawing on her crinkly book with her hard-won tooth
The patient
Sleepy but snuggly
Her gymnastics (or taekwondo) career is still promising

Sam's Class's Frog Performance

2011-07-13T04:50:00.000-07:00

Sam’s performance this morning was very funny. His group did a little play—or whatever the word is for three year olds—about thirty-six frogs. The story told of mommy and daddy frog raising their tadpoles. Then the frogs have different adventures. They were taught a few lines. At one point Sam and others are holding a rope and each frog is supposed to say “what is this?” But Sam just said “snake!” Everyone laughed. Then the teachers explained the “rope” is really a snake. Funny stuff. Don’t give Sam any secrets to keep for a while. He seems to like his class and loves his teachers.

I think he’s doing okay with the hospital trip. Last night he asked for Emily a couple of times. I had him “help” feed Eli before bed, which seemed to help. He really loves his little siblings a lot, even if he can be a little too exuberant at times.

A fun time at school!
Sam's class
Sam lets out the news that this is a snake and not just a rope
Sam spots dad
Waiting to be introduced

Day 2

2011-07-12T04:44:00.000-07:00

Nothing new to report today, but we're hoping we'll get results tomorrow from some of the tests that have been done: blood, urine, x-ray, and EKG. Eva refused to sleep for the MRI, so that's tomorrow. (The doctor unhelpfully suggested we discourage her from sleeping tonight so she can sleep for it. Um, no.) Anyway, she's gone from 5.2 kg at entrance to almost 6.2 kg today. So that is a big improvement.

We're still not sure what to make of this. Is the dehydration the cause or the symptom? Were her teeth bugging her and she stopped eating as well? This is what we're hoping for. A couple of genetic syndromes were suggested, but they're all super rare and have symptoms Eva doesn't have.

Eva herself looked a lot better today. She was cooing and smiling when I came in this morning. She slept a fair amount today, but did seem to have more pep.

That's what we know! We're both feeling pretty exhausted. I had trouble sleeping last night. I'm going to try to get Sam to bed at a more reasonable hour tonight. Eli's already down. They both seem enthusiastic about life. Hopefully we'll have more clarity in the next few days.

Lightweight

2011-07-09T04:53:00.000-07:00

So, Eva has been losing weight slowly the last several weeks, but it now adds up to about 15-20% of her body-weight (7.1 kg a month ago; 5.6kg now). We did a well visit/shots a couple of weeks ago and the doctor said its just teeth (looked in her throat, did check up). Two weeks ago we tried another hospital, and this one said teeth also and gave an antihistamine, which we've since discovered is common here and is meant to increase appetite (we didn't use it then, but will probably start tomorrow). Early this week, Emily went to our pediatrician. She asked for a blood test. He said he doesn't like to poke babies unless it's necessary. He said her teeth are erupting, although we can't feel them coming in yet.

It probably is her teeth. She doesn't like to eat. She moves her mouth around. She makes a gagging noise a little easier. While Eli has had both bottom teeth for a while, hers still haven't come in. Anyway, today I called a friend on campus and she helped us find a local hospital with pediatric hours this morning. Emily and the friend on campus went to a third hospital. The doctor there said he was a bit more worried and they did a full consultation. They did ultrasound of head and stomach, to make sure there were no obstructions. They took blood. We don't know when we'll get the results. The doc said her fontanels have already closed up, which is definitely on the early side, but not uncommon. Friends have suggested it could be something like anemia or thyroid. Anyway, it's all a little scary. I'm hoping we'll get results on Monday or Tuesday. Our nanny also has a friend who took a kid to the main national hospital and has a name for their early birth/weight issues doctor, so we could go there on Wednesday if necessary.

Anyway... Just a bit perplexing. To clarify, Eva is still nursing and eats at least a little every day. Sam also lost weight as he grew, but we don't remember it being so dramatic. We're hoping that this is just the result of the contrast between the two babies, where Eli is in constant motion and can really throw his weight around. Eva does smile and make eye contact, but she seems less energetic. Hopefully we'll at least cross some things off soon and then can reevaluate.

35

2011-06-29T06:13:00.001-07:00

Today's my birthday. This ends our streak of celebrations. We've just come through our anniversary, mother's day, Emily's birthday, (US) father's day, and now my birthday. Exciting! Exhausting! Tonight a great coworker went with us to dinner. I don't think we could have pulled off dinner without her. We're still hoping to pull off a movie sometime in the next few days. I kind of miss the movie theater in the small mall we used to have nearby in the garden state. It was nice to be able to pop over midday for cheaper tickets in an empty theater. Here it's a little more involved.

Sam's coming along. He's consistently pooping in the potty and stays dry through the night. Big things for us! The babies are coming along. Eli's a bouncing, jumping, exuberant baby. Eva looks a little more serious. We think her mouth has been bugging her, and she's even lost a tiny bit of weight. We took her to the doctor and they said nothing's the matter. One challenge of twins is that now we always have a comparison point, so "normal" is even harder to define.

That's the news from here. Photos to follow in a future post.

Campus Birds

2011-06-19T01:32:00.000-07:00

These last weeks I was lucky enough to catch pictures of the two most beautiful birds that inhabit the campus--the "five colored bird" and the blue magpie. Beautiful! It's nice to be in such a beautiful place.

Father's Day #1

2011-06-19T01:19:00.000-07:00

As I've discussed before, I now get two Father's Days, both the US one and the local one (on 8/8 which sounds like "ba-ba"). Actually, I'm coming to the opinion that you should get at least one father's day per kid. Maybe I could squeeze another one in in early winter sometime.

Emily took me to one of the best steakhouses in town today, at a hotel not far from church. It was really delicious. We got a steak-for-two meal that was possibly the best steak we've had. It came with four different types of salt and a roasted garlic plant (I don't know what it's called--not a single clove, but a whole plant cut in two and roasted). Yum! I ordered salmon as my appetizer (predictably Sam loved it) and Emily got a salad. It also came with desert and coffee and we ordered sweet potato fries for Sam. Truly an awesome meal. It also turns out, that if you show up at a very nice hotel with your three young children, they will give you your own room. So we had a small private dining room all to ourselves, which let Sam trade seats, try out sugar cubes, eat large quantities of bread, etc. Fun, fun, fun.

Our odd story of the day is that as I was waiting for Emily outside of a store with the twins, a little kid came running up, bit Eli on the foot, and then took off. His father came after him, whacked him once, never looked at me and then dragged him off. It took me (and I think Eli too) a minute to register what had happened. Eli had a little mark on the foot, but the bite didn't break the surface. A strange interlude in an otherwise pleasant day.

However, our children are not giving us the afternoon nap we'd asked for this fathers' day. Sam's asleep now but Eva and Eli are both quite fussy. We're hoping it will be a quieter night. We've just come off of several days of a guest and we get more guests midweek. All good, but it's harder to concentrate and keep working away on things. Also, I restart language this week, so it could be a busy week.

For fun, I've pasted pictures of Sam reading to Eva and Eli. What a good big brother!

Rainy Days June 2011

2011-06-10T07:30:00.001-07:00

I started to title this and saw that, ahem, apparently I have titled posts "Rainy Days" before. We're now in full rain season. A typhoon is apparently passing by us. It won't hit, but it means tomorrow will be an inside day. At this point, I'm thinking I'll go with the astronomy museum tomorrow. Perhaps we'll make our first attempt at the movie theater there? I'm not sure how Sam would do with a dark room and a big-screen movie.

Not much else to report. An old friend and occasional reader of this blog did his dissertation defense today. It makes me very happy. It's such a long process, with the outcome never 100% certain, so I'm happy for him.

We think Eva's teething, which explains her general not-going-with-the-plan lately. She's not drinking or eating as much, pulling at ears, fussing a little more, etc. We could have some hard nights ahead of us.

Grading has started. About 5/11 students are finished. Next up is writing syllabi for the next semester. Also lots of reading for another project. Today I read an article and a half. Things are coming along. That's it for us.

Day 3

2011-06-06T04:57:00.000-07:00

Swinging!
With her three
With mohawk
Sandbox kid
Birthday girl

As I write this, Sam is singing the name of the nanny, which is cracking us up. We're wrapping up three days. Three looooooong days. Three days where times were fun, but they just seemed to creep by. Actually, after a rocky start, day three came off pretty well. Eva woke up early this morning and wouldn't go back to sleep, so Emily was already in a pretty bad mood by the time Sam and I woke up (lateish). I took the two babies and Sam for a walk. I'd made the mistake of telling Sam we would be going to the park, so he was lobbying hard for an immediate departure, but he eventually assented to a trip in the backpack and a stroll to the retirement home nearby and back. It is getting hot! I think today was around 90, but with the humidity much hotter feeling. Anyway, it was an okay trip and when we got back we were able to head off to lunch, then park, then a quick grocery trip by Emily. The park itself was fun, with a sandbox, some time on swings, and a baby nap. But the logistics are always a little hard--parking, babies knocking cups over, fighting off the sun, and so on.

Emily's mom keeps saying that the time will go by quickly, which is true from a grandparent's perspective, but from the starting line of parenting, it still often seems like a really long race ahead of us. I know the babies actually are growing up quickly, but on a day by day basis, it's just hard to keep everyone clean and fed and disease-free, to slice up two parents three ways, and to do the other work we're supposed to be doing as our main job. Things are coming along, and we will genuinely miss these days. Emily and I joke about it a lot actually, because we'll recount a day and realize that it was pretty rocky, but already it's just becoming "Emily's fun birthday where we went to the park." This conceals the mom-headache, the twins who kept trying to pull the food off the table, the parking hassle, the beating sun, the husband complaining he has to read two articles and do a powerpoint by tomorrow, etc. The fun day at the park. Got that?

Well, I'm now over 200 posts on this blog. Emily's at 35 sparkling years, putting her half way to her biblical three score and ten (oops, maybe I shouldn't have mentioned that). The babies are asleep. Sam didn't take a nap so he'll be down soon too. Life is coming along. Goodbye three day holiday! Back to the familiar tomorrow.

Dragon Boats 2

2011-06-04T14:12:00.001-07:00

Coming back from the race
Our friend's boat
Sam nervously riding his airplane
Emily with stinky tofu!
Corndog!

There are a number of other pictures I didn't post here. Highlights included copious quantities of fried foods--yum! We also had samosas and a meat burrito thing. One of the funny things about the race was an advertisement for an eMBA. Not the type of thing you see back home! We continue to get people who take lots of pictures without asking us, which is kind of a pain. I am mostly polite, but I think it's the whole cross-cultural/spectacle aspect that gets to me. I just try to remember that people are curious and cross-cultural understanding is a good thing :)

Otherwise life is good. I'm more productive lately. The long Saturdays always kind of over-extrovert me, so I'm up in the middle of the night right now (something I usually do when I don't have the time/space to process what's going on around me). I know this is sort of crazy, but lying in bed doesn't seem to help.

Babies are thriving. Sometimes I realize I've only been at this parenting thing for a couple of years and am still a rookie, so we're still tracking down resources and trying to figure things out. Emily spent some time reading through Ferber today to see if there are any tips for Sam (not much). I'm reading Amy Choa's book, which is an interesting take on parenting east and west and the immigrant experience.

I talked to my brother last night, which was a lot of fun. We're both playing with android devices right now. I'm hoping that this summer we'll get to connect with people more online and by mail.

More today or tomorrow!

Dragon Boats 1

2011-06-04T14:05:00.000-07:00

Riverside
Having fun by the boats, under the bridge
Ambulance
Audi was advertising--they gave him a balloon, so we'll put up a picture
Playing with little brother

OK, these are mostly just fun pictures of Sam from today. We went to watch a friend compete in the dragon boat races (they came in third in their heat, so they get to compete again tomorrow). Sam had a pretty good time. There was tasty food. He rode in a little airplane ride, but decided to get out after the first loop (he looked a little scared). He got a dolphin balloon (no picture). At one point I bonked him in the head with my camera by accident, so we took him to a tent and they dabbed it with alcohol and something. Oops! He was pretty fussy, but then he fell asleep in the stroller as we were wheeling up to our door, so I think he was just exhausted. Boats! Food! Rides! Balloons! Toys! A lot of excitement for a little kid.

Some pictures at home

2011-06-04T13:59:00.000-07:00

Baby dangling
Smiley
Worthy Adversaries
Rocking
Power crawler

June

2011-06-03T04:25:00.000-07:00

Sam with "tiger stripes" on his forehead from school today--Emily, Eva, and Eli in background
Close up--he really liked them
We went to a concert on campus! It was fun--time together is a great thing
Eva sometimes falls asleep in the jumper; she also likes to be upside down, like I did when I was a child

These last weeks of May and then early June are always exciting. It's a busy time, with lots happening, but people seem excited about the completion of the semester's work and the approaching summer.

I'm feeling about the same myself. I have one more class left. I preached three times in the last week and probably have one more sermon to go. Language will keep us busy, the summer is always more relaxed (even if scorching hot).

I'm trying to be more productive. I bought an android tablet this week, but then realized tablets are really best for entertainment. On the upside, it has a night reading mode, so last night I read a novel for forty-five minutes while I waited for Sam to go to sleep. This could be good for my soul.

We're heading into a three day weekend. I think under normal conditions we're both involved parents, but we're looking at three 16 hour + days of parenting ahead. We're going to a boat race tomorrow--should be fun--and then we're not sure what we'll do with our holiday day on Monday.

No great developmental news. Eva can just about sit up. We learned there's a saying in local language to the effect that "six months sitting, seven months crawling, eight months teething." Eli can now go five or six feet over the period of a few minutes and can, unfortunately, push himself out of his bumbo seat (which are supposed to be nearly untippable). Eva goes down a bit more smoothly at night. Sam is using the "spitting" toothpaste now (it can have a small amount of fluoride in it). Sam's still working on his bigger bike--it's still a little too big. He continues to love all manner of vehicles, but also really enjoyed stopping in the campus library tonight. He is now aware that he's speaking two languages and can tell you what the word is in the other language most of the time--pretty cool.

That's the news. I'll try to post lots of pictures and updates over the holiday.

Anniversaries and other matters

2011-05-25T09:20:00.000-07:00

Emily and I have a home-made album with some pictures my Uncle took. Today is our tenth anniversary, so I had fun scanning some of them and putting them up. Markers like this help put things in perspective. Emily said "it feels like twenty years!" Then she apologized for the fact that my hair is graying. I told her it's been a good ten years--just a lot has happened.

These are busy days. I just emailed off a paper for a conference on Saturday. Emily's going to read a sermon I'm using for this Sunday (and reusing on Tuesday for chapel).

And then I just walked into the bathroom and there was a HUGE roach swimming in the toilet. Even more frighteningly, the little nob on the sink was pushed up, so I am wondering where the roach came from. Did she swim up out of the toilet? Crawl up out of the sink and push up the little plunger thing? Come from some other pipe? I really hate rainy season. Emily can kill a roach and go right back to sleep, but they always wake me up for a while.

The other good news is that the most amazing coworker in the world helped me pay my taxes. Yay! Thank you! I'm really glad we didn't have to go down to the main building.

That's the news here. Aren't you glad I don't take pictures of the roaches? Instead enjoy the two pictures above, old and new. I'm liking the scanned old black and white film, and the new slr picture also. Here's planning for another exciting decade ahead, hopefully with fewer roaches...

The Minor Rebellion of SPS

2011-05-16T08:42:00.001-07:00

Now that the twins are sleeping well, Sam is waging a small war to have mom transferred back into our room. The downside of the twins sleeping well (ok, it's still a huge upside overall) is that Emily can't sleep in their room and so needs to sleep in our bedroom (or, the "dude room" as we've been calling it). The problem with this is that we really only have a double bed. We tried a double mattress on the floor also, but that was kind of a catastrophe; our room became a single expanse of sleeping surfaces. Then, Emily bought a tatami. The tatami is not bed for a kid, but is a bit hard for an adult. It also doesn't solve the problem, since if Emily is on the ground, then Sam wants to move down and now Emily is sharing a small tatami with Sam. Alternately, Sam and I share a bed, or we all share a bed. It's a little confusing.

The other problem is that now that Emily's back in the room, Sam "waits up" for her. By "waits up," I mean that he starts rolling around the bed, gives me little pats, says "mommy coming soon?" hopefully, and does not go to sleep. This is all around 10 when Emily is feeding the babies, which can take forty or forty-five minutes. (As I write this, I'm hopeful that the feedings may accelerate, which I remember happens in time.)

So, this leaves several possibilities:

(1) sleep train Sam now

(2) mom stays with the babies

(3) get a cot that can go in another room--not ideal since I'm often up working

(4) get a bigger bed (a real possibility, if kings exist in Taiwan)

(5) buy a twin mattress or something more comfortable than a tatami

These seem to be the possibilities. Kind of a pain right now, since sleep is so central to life. No doubt someday we will for this type of a problem, instead of whatever our new problem is (tattoos, tuition, etc.). Nonetheless, for now it's a challenge.

Photo shoot

2011-05-13T19:45:00.000-07:00

Updates

2011-05-13T19:41:00.000-07:00

Things are a looking a little brighter this week. The babies are coming along. They continue to be decent sleepers at night, and are eating solid foods twice a day (sweet potatoes, cereal, bananas). Eli is an enthusiastic eater. He opens his mouth expectantly, and then swallows most of it. Eva’s not quite so efficient, but all things in time. Emily was remembering that Sam used to give a little shiver whenever he’d try something new. It feels like it was just, hmm, two and a half years ago.

Sam is coming along. He’s speaking a lot more in local language. He was resisting school the first few days this week, but then seemed to go enthusiastically the last couple of days. On Thursday I watched him go in and join a group of classmates playing on mats, and then head over to do the cars to ride. The teachers all seem to love him, and he really has a community there. It’s hard to believe sometimes how quickly he is growing up.

The rest of the week has been good. I always get a bit nervous near the end of the semester. I have several sermons coming up, then grading, different projects, revisions, etc. Stressful! I think in general we are more settled than we’ve been in a while, but I still find the general stress of getting things done a bit challenging.

Mother's Day with three

2011-05-08T08:57:00.001-07:00

Eli and Eva at church, picture by Monica

I'm not sure yet that this mother's day deserves to be recorded. It's been hit-and-miss. The babies woke early and I got up with them. I didn't hear the monitor last night and slept deeply. I was able to talk to my parents, grandparents, aunt and uncle, and cousin, all via skype. It was fun to show the kids to them and to get their take on things, and to hear a little about what parenting was like for them. My cousin Amy had babysat twins, so it was good to get her take on things.

We talked to Emily' s parents and made it to church. I made pancakes for breakfast. Emily enjoyed the service. Sam loves the church library and was (mostly) content to read about dinosaurs. A friend took some photos (posted above).

We found a new grocery store near the church. This probably doesn't seem like a major victory, but for us it was a nice surprise. It cuts out an extra trip on Sunday.

I got Sam to nap at 3:30, which was late. In retrospect, we maybe should have just kept him up. The twins, however, were fairly terrible. Finally, I took them for a walk, but even then they didn't really sleep. I feel like so much of our thought now is concentrated on sleep: the one who shouldn't nap is napping, why won't they nap, why are they getting up so early, I want to sleep but I'm not at all tired... As I write this, the twins had gone down smoothly, but Sam stayed up forever twiddling with a toy motorcycle he has. Emily's in bed convincing him to sleep, and I'm awake enough that I've given up on sleep for now and will try in another hour. Welcome to our reality...

The funny thing is that I'm 99% certain I will have no memory of any of this. Whenever I talk to parents from this stage, they haven't the vaguest memory of how it worked: "One of our kids liked to sleep in the car, but I'm not sure which one," "I think they used to get up in the middle of the night--I can't remember," "They used a pacifier, wait, maybe that was my cousin..." "I think we tried to sleep train them" "I don't remember when they weaned." Just about any question we ask--about food, naps, sicknesses--it's all just gone. I remember reading that our brains can't really remember pain--if we could we'd relive it. I think maybe this stage of parenting is kind of like that. I know it's happening, we're tired, there's a lot of fun mixed in, and yet I'll remember almost none of it. I probably won't remember that Sam used to swap between beds, complain about the noise of the air conditioner, ask for juice, or pat our hair. And I won't remember that the twins went to bed between six and seven, snacked at ten, and then could mostly sleep through. I won't remember when Eva started turning over at night (last night), when we noticed Eli's first tooth (today, on the bottom to the right), or that Eli was the messy eater the first week we started solids. I may not even remember their cries or their laughter. Eli has this series of loud "hugh!" and Eva's is a kind of screech. In both cases their laughs and cries are similar, cheerful and smiling when they are happy, angry and insistent when they're upset. It's crazy.

Mother's Day wishes to all of you out there. Thank you for putting in the hours, the time, the struggle. Thank you for your surrogacy of those who cross your paths. Thank you for the care and the love. Remember the fun times. You can forget the sleepless nights.

Night 5, about the same

2011-05-01T21:06:00.000-07:00

Last night I got up with the twins around 3. Eva went back to sleep immediately, but Eli took a long time. I stayed up and worked on a paper (I really like it when no one else is awake) and then went back to sleep. I'm not sure professionally it's acceptable to do a 10-3, 6-9 sleep pattern, but it is kind of working for me. Nonetheless, I think we have basically four longterm sleep possibilities:

(1) Old schedule (mom feeds sporadically throughout night)
(2) Old school cry-it-out (if Eli wants to cry from 3-4, maybe that's okay, and we don't have to get up with him; I'm pretty sure this is what parents used to do in the US; I'm not sure the patting is helping either of them that much)
(3) Try Ferber for a few more weeks
(4) Add a middle of the night feeding. For instance, first time after 2 that one wakes up you go and feed both of them and come back to bed. Then we don't get them again until 6 or 7.

OK, this is probably my last sleep update for a while. I think we are trying to avoid the evils of (1) three kids in our bed, (2) sleepless, misanthropic mom, (3) psychologically wounded children. I think six months is seeming like just the perfect time to take a stab at this and then we'll see where it goes..

Night 4

2011-04-30T06:55:00.000-07:00

Last night was rough. Emily was up on and off from 2-4 and then I did 4-5. I think in this period, Eva woke up twice and Eli woke up twice. The thing is, I don't think they're hungry. They mostly go back to sleep quickly. We basically have three choices: (1) Emily cosleeps and feeds intermittently, as we did with Sam, but for two kids this time, (2) we add a hard-and-fast middle of the night feeding, which would be something like 7pm, 10pm, 2am, and 6am; or (3) we try to stretch them to a six to eight hour fit of sleeping. Right now, Emily sleep feeds around 10 and then Eva usually wakes up once or twice briefly and Eli wakes up once and then she feeds them around 5:30 when dawn starts. All things in time...

Night 2

2011-04-27T10:38:00.000-07:00

It's the second night and so far things are going well. Eva was up for about a half hour again (maybe a little longer). Tonight we're trying to eliminate the pacifier from the equation. Last night Eva went until 5am-ish and Eli went a little longer. Eli had woken up around 2 last night, so I'm going to see if he pops up again here in another half hour or so.

We still don't know if longer sleep will mean a real difference. If they are eating at 10 and 5 it may mean a major sleep disruption, but still much better than it could have been.

Our nanny today said our kids are pretty good. People often ask her if two is really hard, but she said ours cry less than the last baby she had. Neither of them seem to be doing high-pitch screaming--maybe they're just too tired. Instead, it's as if they wake up and want reassurance and kind of grumble until they fall back asleep.

It's an education we are getting. I guess it's a good thing we are each distinct, but it would be nice if there really were a universal set of rules...

Go to bed, mean babies...

2011-04-26T11:09:00.001-07:00

I used to sing a song to Sam, when I'd want him to go to sleep: go to sleep mean baby, go to sleep mean baby, it's time for you to rest... It was very comforting somehow. I think one of the central challenges of parenthood is that you often have to act in a way different than you feel. Thankfully, toddlers (and certainly infants) can't read sarcasm.

One of the challenges we have now is that we face parenting challenges on several fronts. Sam's pretty much down to just using a binky (with a small hole) at nighttime. Potty training has been a bit iffy. Sam's been peeing well for the last several weeks, but has only really gotten the hang of poop over the weekend. It's still a work in progress. We'd started things last summer, but they weren't taking, and we heard that it's best to avoid major changes with the addition of a new sibling(s). Thankfully, Sam is a model big brother, but we are still trying to put him through the hoops on the way out of toddlerdom.

Right now, we're trying for the first time to see what happens during the night if we don't immediately feed the twins. If this goes well, we'll either move to one feeding during the night or to no feedings. Right now, the twins go down around 7 and then Emily feeds them again around 10 before she goes to bed. However, they've continued to feed frequently. Emily isn't always sure how much they've eaten or when they've eaten and is feeling tired.

Below's part of an email detailing how it's going. It's now 2:14 am, and I've only been at this seriously for about an hour. My goal is to make it to 5, but Emily said I can wake her up earlier if that doesn't work:

I'm up late. We're making our first run at sleep training. Eva woke up at 12:30 but then after a little comforting and patting went back to sleep. However, Eli woke up a little before 2 and is kind of bellowing. He's not crying, just letting us know that it would be fine if we'd feed him now.

I think Emily could live with one feeding a night, but it would help to have an idea of what they need and what they're doing now. I think Eva can probably go four or five hours and the same is true for Eli. Once we get a handle on things, maybe Emily could move back in with Sam and I and just do a middle of the night fight. Our hope is to at least stretch things out a little.

I have class tomorrow afternoon, but not until 3:30. I am plunking away on small projects now and hoping that Eli will take a rest in the near future. I think we did well making it to six months (well, a couple of days more).

This is all quite an adventure. Emily's written to several friends in the last few days. I think if we can get some longer blocks at night, it will be a big step forward. Here's hoping...

Day 4 Staycation is done!

2011-04-05T03:11:00.000-07:00

Today we went to the small city where a river flows into the ocean. It was a long day, but one that was very fun. We agreed to meet two friends, one of whom works with the church main office here. Sam was excited to ride the train out and may have enjoyed this part best of all. When we got there we met the two friends and took a walk. We passed one of the historic churches and stopped in an art museum (not primarily for the art, but for the breastfeeding room). Sam was kind of a pain during this part. The waterfront has a lot of little vehicles you can ride, games to play, etc. He rejected the playground we took him to because he really wanted to ride one of the cars. He did get into one of the art exhibits, which featured hundreds of toy animals. He enjoyed going around, pointing at them, and saying the names. We went to a local noodle shop for lunch, stopped at McD for coffee and ice cream and then headed home. This does not sound like a long day, but it was impressively busy for us. It always makes me happy when we can include other people, in part just because it gives them a glimpse of our life also. I know our kids bring a lot of joy to others, and we like that also.

Four long days! We're looking forward to preschool for Sam tomorrow and having childcare help. I have a lot of language on Thursday and Friday (eight hours), but tomorrow should be relatively quiet. I'm looking forward to going back to the normal routine.

Day 3

2011-04-03T22:31:00.000-07:00

Sam manipulates a model radio telescope
Moon lander
Enjoying the galaxy

Blast off!

Today has so far gone according to plan, although it's 2:00 and no signs of a nap for Sam. We visited the local science/astronomy museum today and Sam had a great time. His favorite parts were the videos where you can push buttons to start them (especially one about the extinction of dinosaurs) or similar exhibits (a radio satellite that rotates). He also really liked the rockets and space shuttles. He got scared several times, probably because it was such a different environment, dimly lit with a lot of big objects (gigantic planets) and strange sounds. He was scared of the planets and of a talking robot. I asked him if he was interested in doing a space shuttle ride they had, and he said he didn't want to.

They also have, astoundingly, IMAX and 3D theaters. I'm not quite sure how we lucked out on having this nearby, but I think it'll be really fun. Emily thinks he's probably too small for the movies, but the museum is close to one of the churches we attend, so we may still give it a try. Luckily, Sam's new enough at this that he entirely missed the gift shop. There's also a good park outside of the museum, although it was indeed rainy today, so we just walked around for a little while.

Tickets aren't too pricey normally, but today for children's day (4/4) admission was free for each parent/kid pair. Next year maybe we'll go and bring a friend. So far the four-day plan is chugging along. Tonight we're going to get pizza and have a friend come over. Tomorrow could be dicey with weather, but we're still hoping to get over to the riverfront. All of this said, the house is slumping towards chaos. Emily was able to bathe the twins this morning, but otherwise it will probably be pretty much a wash. I also had a strange sleep night (late to bed, up early). However, a happy toddler and some smiley twins balances out the challenges.

Day 2

2011-04-03T07:00:00.001-07:00

Eva's first outing in a dress; Eli's wearing his cool criminal duds
Sam is very pleased with himself. Every time he slides down, he smiles the whole way and then usually applauds.
He started out on his stomach and then switched to the more conventional system. Even though these slides are awesome, we agreed that Americans parks could probably never have them for legal reasons
Here he is a with a whole pack of kids. A fun day!

A great day, first church then a trip to the park to meet my old college roommate. Everyone did well, although by dinner time we were all exhausted.

Sam loves these stone slides they have here. There's a set of stairs in the middle and then two slides to each side (and same in the other direction, so eight slides total). He just had a blast. I wish I'd counted how many times he went down--it may well have been 150 or more times. I'm surprised he still had so much pep the rest of the night.

The babies are doing great. They're getting bigger. They're both very cute and smiley right now. Taking them to church is still a bit of a challenge. Part of what's hard is that we're always the center of attention. I feel like people are worshiping the babies! I miss just blending in. Anyways, we may just go with it. I told Emily in some ways I almost feel more comfortable visiting new churches, so perhaps we could visit some congregations of friends. The kids don't mind the attention, although Sam's getting a bit more protective of his own space.

It was an interesting theme today. The pastor talked about tombsweeping, which is the holiday to remember the dead (kind of like All Soul's day?). This church is aboriginal, and the pastor talked about how it's not really their holiday, but it's a good time to remember family. A number of members shared about deceased fathers, mothers, or siblings. I was really struck by the value of such a service. I remember my mom did a service around Christmas for those who were grieving, and I think it's a worthwhile addition for those who are missing family members.

Staycation Day 1

2011-04-02T10:15:00.000-07:00

We're now in day one of four of our staycation. Monday is "Children's Day" (4/4) and Tuesday is Tombsweeping Day here (when people visit clean the graves of family members). This means we get four days of interrupted togetherness. In order to maintain sanity, we try to get at least one trip out a day and we make sure Sam takes a nap. If this happens, then everyone survives. Going out of town is a bad idea because everyone is traveling so there are huge traffic jams. A great time to catch up on local life.

Today we went to the suburb where our language school is. We greeted the teachers and introduced Eva and Eli to them. Emily received the folk wisdom that because Eva has a long indent below her nose (what is this called?) she will be able to have a lot of children (and she pointed out that Emily has the same thing). Local culture still has a touch of phrenology. I never know to what to make of this. Sam was saying something to himself about a "big head" in local language recently, which I think comes from school (having a big head is generally considered a good thing here). We always get some interesting cultural wisdom.

The plan for the next three days is: tomorrow: church and park with old college roommate and wife; Monday trip to local science museum (weather will probably be bad); Tuesday: trip to waterfront and hopefully visit a friend. I think we can make it until Wednesday. Today I did about five hours of walking, so at least I'm getting some exercise.

Below (above? blogger always surprises me) are pictures of Sam's first visit to a huge sandbox. He had a lot of fun and played happily by himself for almost an hour. Also, Emily holding both kids.

Logistics

2011-04-01T08:33:00.000-07:00

Today was a long day. I did five hours of language, which is more than usual. I'm coming along on local language, but, wow, it is a slog. I have a new (25 year old) textbook now, which I like, and I'm about down with my textbook series for bigger language.

Today was a lot of logistics: figuring out the kids' insurance cards, getting them inoculated, and trying to get our car inspected. We get a lot of support here, and yet a lot of this is still hard to figure out. Navigating institutions and systems is what's hardest for us. Things that were fairly easy in the States are harder here. We're fairly confident braving the DMV, a hospital or a federal agency back home, but it's harder when you don't know the rules.

It's also hard here to figure out what's a "big" thing and what's a "little" thing. Car related stuff in the States is usually pretty important (being uninsured is really bad) but here a lot of it is suggested more than required (something like half of college aged moped drivers don't have licenses). These types of things are challenging to figure out. Do we go to the public or private inspection facility? What happens if the car fails the inspection? How do we know what failed? How do we balance this with classes and three kids? Today Emily and our (world's most incredible) nanny got a lot of it figured out, but it was really stressful. It helps that many people here have had the experience of living cross-culturally and dealing with these types of questions, so they can (if they think about) realize what's involved.

One of our cultural challenges is that we never know who is responsible. We have at least three people who oversee us in our home denom, and four or five here, and then a handful of people at our school. A lot of people care for us, but it's rare that we know exactly who to ask for help. We know that we should be responsible for ourselves, but doing things ourselves takes longer and often results in delays.

I'm thinking of this post as a kind of aside, to remember later the challenges of adapting to a culture. In the middle of new babies, new teaching schedules, campus politics, and the rest of it, the things I often find most challenging are these types of logistical hurdles. I don't know if they'll get easier with time, or whether they will stick with us. All things in time...

Belated Birthday Post #3

2011-03-31T12:34:00.001-07:00

Emily planned a party for Sam last Monday on his birthday. It was cake and time with some friends on campus. Sam's been working hard on "happy birthday" in both languages and pretty much has it. He had his school party last week where all the birthday kids can go up and the whole nursery school sings (Emily went, he didn't want to go up this year, but had fun anyways).

He was very excited to see some of his fanclub on campus. Two of the high school students and their families were there. The neighbors came, as well as Sam's friend from campus. We got him some huge balloons--a turtle and his name. When the cake came out he started jumping up and down and dancing. I like these early birthdays, which are really fun but can still be a bit low key. Who knows what next year will bring?

Belated Birthday Post #2

2011-03-31T12:24:00.001-07:00

More zoo pictures! Can't wait for #4!

Sam rides an alligator
He was really into the fish--too bad there's no aquarium here
Sam checks out a living ark
The dinosaur house was a lot of fun--now I need to find a natural history museum for him
Can you feel the fear?

Belated Birthday Post #1

2011-03-31T12:13:00.000-07:00

Sam's birthday was last week, and I've been meaning to post about it. He really had a fun few weeks. A (awesome) colleague offered to go to the zoo with us, so we took Sam back. The zoo's becoming our annual pilgrimage. I drove this year, which was a first. The weather was bad-good, by which I mean hazy with the constant look of rain, so crowds were small and we had a great time. The highlight this year was probably the inside exhibits--an educational building with life size dinosaur models and the dinosaur house. Sam got scared both time--by the "growling" of the dinosaurs and by an alligator snapping turtle he could watch in a large tank. He liked pushing the buttons to make frog noises. It was just a very nice day.